early this morning christianity today news briefs reported that:

"The trustees of Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary voted 36-1 on October 17 to prohibit professors or administrators from promoting charismatic practices, such as private prayer languages. In August, a new seminary trustee, Dwight McKissic, told students during a chapel service that he prays in tongues. McKissic, a pastor in Arlington, Texas, has criticized the Southern Baptist Convention's International Mission Board for barring missionaries from using private prayer languages."

in related news, in a blatant attempt to bind the feet of female chinese ministers who are walking away from the baptist faith and mission statement, the international mission board's committee on house church ministry has redefined all female led congregations as multi-dimensional children's ministries.

finally, last week at the national missionary convention hosted by the independent christian churches, churches of christ, the delegates took the unprecedented step of affirming and publishing a non-binding, yet unquestionably biblical, theological statement that will guide all future missionary endeavors. the agreed upon statement reads as follows: "we the autonomous, male missionaries of the indepedent christian churches, churches of christ do hereby agree that while one must not necessarily be immersed to be saved, one is surely going to hell if one is not." in a brief follow-up statement, convention chair michael nichols suggested that the statement was an attempt to both refute the charges of paedo-baptism that have been regularly raised against the un-denomination through the years and divide the group from any other christian denomination that views the practice differently.

unsolicited baseball opinions




signing alfonso soriano for 17 million per is ridiculous. offering him 8 years when nobody else would probably offer him seven and so ensuring that he’ll be on the payroll as a 38 year old arthritic man is re-damn-diculous. i have heard many rational explanations why this is a horrible signing and a few irrational cub fans argue in support.

the best argument i’ve heard against the Soriano signing is from espn insider’s keith law who opened his most recent article with:

“The team that finished last in the National League in OBP in 2006 (and, not coincidentally, second-to-last in runs scored) with a .319 team mark just signed a left fielder with a .320 career OBP and a .337 OBP in 2006 (both figures exclude intentional walks) to replace a guy with a .365 OBP in 2006. And they're paying $17 million per year for the privilege -- until the new player turns 38.

I'm sure this will work out swimmingly.”

the best argument i’ve heard for the Soriano signing is…, um, likely to be muttered by some frat boy in naperville after he’s had six bucks worth of old style.*

the mets just declined to exercise their $14 mil option on tom glavine for 2007 and, due to the current state of their starting rotation and the cost of starting pitching, i’m fairly certain minaya will look back on this decision as a mistake.

go back and read that latter assertion again. i’m afraid it pretty much summarizes the 2006-2007 hot stove season.

the miserly middle-class cardinals and their faithful middle-class fans debated whether jock should pick up jim edmonds’ $10 mil, 2007 option for the better part of two months. then, when the cardinals re-signed “jed” to a 2 year, $18 mil deal most of us considered it excessive. now the reports that the dodgers are signing juan pierre to a 5 yr/45 mil contract have us dancing in the streets.

did i mention that jim hendry is trying to shore up his outfield defense with cliff floyd and is attempting to sign julio lugo

when he already has de rosa at second and izturis at short? something tells me hendry is screaming at his subordinates to get julio franco on the phone and gammons and rosenthal are reconsidering their measured support of the soriano move.

doling out 51.1 million just to negotiate with scott boras for daisuke matsuzaka seemed absolutely absurd until i realized that the cubs could have signed “d-mat” and probably a second tier starter like ted lilly for the same money they spent on sori.

ladies and gentlemen, i present to you the cubs' brand-new #2 starter:



after the jed re-up and the signing of our super-sub jocketty and the cardinal’s camp has been strangely quiet. there are moments when i fear that this silence is evidence of ownership’s reticence to spend serious cash on off-season acquisitions. but, as often as not, i realize that jock is to michael as hendry is to sonny and both haugen and purpura are slick but inconsequential.

* i realize that rosenthal and gammons have provided measured support as well, but i assume that is because they savor the idea of hendry hanging himself.

unanxious daze: an exodus from under-employment


today i am celebrating my ninth month at Silvestri.* and, in even better news, yesterday i got laid off!

as sick as it sounds, for the last 24 hours i have been in a jubilant mood. as of tomorrow afternoon at 2:30 p.m. i never have to explain to the good folks at hotflash america that we do not return items from 2004, serve as my manager's fashion adviser and will never have to say put your big girl panties on and deal with it or you've got boobs! ever again. can you believe that they are actually paying me to leave this company that will soon cease to exist? me neither.

of course i feel bad for my coworkers, some of whom are afraid of re-entering the job market after a thirty year hiatus and others who are loathe to leave an industry that - for some godforsaken reason - they love. but make no mistake, tomorrow after i've given one last hug, muttered one final encouraging cliche and logged off my computer i will once again be a free man.

i am ready to offer one long, last goodbye to silvestri and say hello to a non-profit job that i can actually enjoy (or at least endure). by God's grace, i hope that i never have to settle for a job like this again.

during this time of transition, i would appreciate it if those of you who know and suffer me would be willing to challenge me when i set my occupational sights too low, know of any leads you stumble across and perhaps even whisper a prayer for kellie and i from time to time.

now, if you'll excuse me, i am going to pour a cup of tea and head over to Viva El Birdos. much love, much peace.

In this Theological Discussion, God is Considered Optional

When a local theological group gathers Tuesday in a Kenmore Square office, its members won't be talking about God. They'll be talking about not talking about God.

The Boston Emergent Cohort hosts Peter Rollins, author of "How (Not) to Speak of God," for a 7 p.m. discussion at 655 Beacon St., Suite 301. The Cohort is part of a progressive Christian movement known as the Emerging Church, which seeks to encourage conversations among believers about Christianity's role in the modern world.

Rollins, who heads a church in Ireland, is a leading voice in the movement. A reviewer recently described his book as "powerful but frustratingly opaque."

Both qualities are likely to be on display at the event. Rollins is expected to discuss his proposal for "heretical orthodoxy," according to Jeff Gentry, a facilitator with the Cohort and pastor to a small home-based church in Beverly. Heretical orthodoxy means moving theology away from "a study of God as object, or a theology that seeks to believe the right things" and toward an idea of "Christianity as trying to live in the right way," Gentry says.

Anna Gerdeen, studying for a master's at Harvard Divinity School, became involved in the Emerging Church in her native Minnesota before moving to the area three years ago and connecting with the Cohort. Gerdee says she's seen increased interest in nontraditional religion.

"With the large number of students and young people in the area, people come into here from different backgrounds from all over the country, and different Christian traditions," she says, creating fertile ground for new ideas.~J.M. BERGER

this brief piece was included in the metro section of sunday's boston globe. props to anna for drawing my attention to the article. i appreciate mr. berger's interest in emergent and his unexpected inquiry. however, i would like to affirm that God will likely be a primary subject of, and hopefully participant in, our conversation on tuesday. moreover, i appreciate the fact that the writer quoted me correctly and wish the latter spelling of anna's last name was correct.

i hope that a number of you are joining us on tuesday for a beerworks dinner at 5:30 and a stimulating conversation with peter at 7 pm. if you're interested in picking up a copy of how (not) to speak of God we'll have copies available for $12 thanks to the generous folks at paraclete press.

for an interesting introduction to peter's thought, check out nick and josh's most recent podcast.*

* i haven't had the time to listen to the podcast myself, so i'm acting on complete faith here. nick and josh, don't let me down.

musing...


during my years at soybean bible the writings of henri nouwen were essential to my spiritual health. however, in the years since i left soybean and, later, l’arche daybreak behind, i have only revisited his writings rarely.

i am starting to suspect that my indifference is a mistake.

a couple of nights ago, after receiving news that yet another friend is mired in the midst of crisis, i took can you drink the cup off the shelf. i can’t remember reading this little work before, but i confess that it has served as a remarkable sacrament in my life this week.

i must confess that much like james and john, i often lust for influence and recognition in the Kingdom of God. as a fully equipped servant of Jesus, i consider myself a significant member of Jesus’ mission and expect to be included in noteworthy, if not successful, incarnations of God’s beauty, truth and goodness in this world. in short, i want to build a successful and meaningful career on the back of the one who humbled himself and made himself obedient to death on a cross. fortunately, in response to my foolishness Jesus neither rejects me nor reviles me as "satan," but simply asks: "can you drink the cup?"

henri has helped me to see that responding to this question requires me to pause and consider whether i have the courage to hold the cup of our great suffering and great joy in my hands; in full knowledge of the cup’s bittersweet contents, i can lift the cup and offer a blessing in the midst of curse and whisper rumors of life in the midst of death; and, ultimately, drink the cup of suffering and joy to the dregs.

in the midst of my longing for success, Jesus is calling me to become fully human. as much as it pains me to admit it, he could care less whether i have a successful career or whether i continue to wander through occupational hell for the rest of my days. Jesus has not promised me an honored position, but he has called me to be a parable of his grace and truth. further, Jesus has not sent me forth to construct a respectable curriculum vitae, but he has given me the mission of weeping with those who weep and mourning with those who mourn.

leave it to Jesus to deconstruct my delusions and unravel my expectations with a single question: "can you drink the cup."

five minute movie review: borat

i was initially reluctant to pay $10 to see this film, but after hearing a number of reviewers describe it as a form of provocative cultural commentary and hearing kidpositive and cade's enthusiasm for this film, i decided to take a chance.

although i did not think that the film provided particularly insightful cultural commentary - i'm sure that with a little editing and enough "gotcha" set-ups you can make any country look like it is full of racist, ignorant fools - i have to admit that the movie was incredibly funny. there were scenes that made me really uncomfortable such as when the "throw the Jew down the well" singing borat and his companion found themselves shacked up at a Jewish owned bed and breakfast, but there were also hysterical scenes, especially the one in which borat sings the kazakh national anthem to the tune of the star spangled banner at a virginia rodeo, that were completely worth the price of admission.

if you don't mind a little controversial humor and can stand the sight of a male on male sixty-nine,* then you might want to give borat a shot. please note, i am not recommending the film as such, but i think a number of you would find it hysterical.

one side note: over the past couple of weeks there have been reports that the south carolina fraternity boys who made asses of themselves in the film, the romanian extras who stood in as extras in borat's "kazakh" village and any number of others are planning to sue sacha cohen for their portrayal in the film. i think such lawsuits are ridiculous and are likely built upon legal sand. in the midst of a satirical situation, decent, upright people such as the humor coach, the newscasters and, as much as i hate to admit it, the southern baptist people on secession drive proved their decency, while sketchy folk such as the frat boys and the rodeo manager showed their asses.

if you've caught the flick, i'd love to hear your thoughts.

* the pixie covered my eyes during that part.

UPDATE! boston's emergent cohort presents peter rollins



due to unexpected publicity and the possibility of a higher than expected turnout we have decided to move the main cohort gathering to the offices of Reunion Church (665 beacon st, Suite 301, Boston, MA 02215). moreover, since a number of us would also like to gather at the fenway beerworks (61 brookline ave, boston, ma 02215) for dinner we're going to do that as well.

so if you want to join us for dinner, meet us at the fenway beerworks around 5:30 pm. the regular meeting will start at 7 pm at the offices of Reunion church. got it? if not, feel free to comment or send queries to jeff gentry at gentry13@gmail.com.

"All my friends became Cardinal fans and grew up happy and liberal. I became a Cub fan and grew up imbittered and conservative." - George Will

now that it is far less likely to be perceived as piling on...

i would like to draw your attention to jeff sharet's piece entitled Soldiers of Christ that focuses upon ted haggard and new life church. in this article, which was published in harper's over a year ago, mr. sharet skillfully reveals the triumphalism and alludes to the docetism which plagues american evangelicalism. moreover, he also records the musings of a royal ranger leader which now seem eerily prophetic. if you take the time to peruse this article, or any number of pieces on killing the buddha you will not be disappointed.

of course, after you read the article i'd love to hear your thoughts and reflections.

-------

update: KTB has also posted these reflections by patton dodd, who is the author of the well-regarded my faith so far, beliefnet columnist, alumnae of oral roberts university*, attender of new life church and close friend of ted haggard. patton's intimate reflections focus on the power of repentance and the hope reconciliation. this article pierced my soul.**

* the campus of which looks so much like walt disney world's tomorrowland (circa 1986) that it skeeves me out)

** i realize the latter statement probably sounds cheesy as hell, but...

some sacraments are unexpected


a few moments ago, while talking with cade about N&MBL@* and surfing boston.com i ran across a puff piece titled worst jobs ever. i found the first few entries, which focused on a subservient cocktail waitress and driving range ball bitch, rather innocuous. but then, but then, i ran across a winner:

"While in college (down south where there's very few jobs), I worked in a factory that made the plastic covers for Die Hard car batteries. The covers would come sliding down the conveyor belt after being stamped by an automated machine with the words DIE HARD. My job, was to stand there (not allowed to sit) and look at each plastic cover as it passed and make sure the words DIE HARD were stamped on perfectly straight. If it was crooked (AND THEY NEVER WERE) I had to throw it out. To make matters worse they were 12 hour shifts. 5 minutes literally felt like an hour. It was so loud you had to wear ear plugs, so you couldn't even use a radio to pass the time. Not the worst or grossest job in the world, but DEFINITELY one of the most boring and mind-numbing." -townclose

have you ever had a job that is as monotonous or hilarious as this one? if so, please tell. as for me, this little story is a sacrament that has set me free to sail into tomorrow (relatively) unencumbered.

* if you ask nicely, mr. sajak might let you buy a vowel.

university of virginia sociologists study "what women want..."

and are shocked to find that they aren't infatuated with drunken australian anti-semites.

but seriously, this afternoon christianitytoday.com is featuring an interview with sociologists steven l. nock and w. bradford wilcox that i found quite interesting. after reading any number of arguments that were provoked by mark driscoll's comments* concerning the weight of minister's wives, i found this article on how husbands can serve their wives quite refreshing. i have posted an excerpt of the article below, but i hope you can take the time to read the article in its entirety.

What makes married women happy?

"The biggest predictor of women's happiness is their husband's emotional engagement. The extent to which he is affectionate, to which he is empathetic, to which he is basically tuned into his wife, this is the most important factor in predicting the wife's happiness. This basically drowns out every other factor in our models."

read more...

* NB: bullet point 2.

boston's emergent cohort presents peter rollins

on tuesday, november 21st @ 7 pm the cohort will be gathering at boston beerwork's fenway location (61 brookline ave, boston, ma 02215) for food, drinks and theological discussion. our guest this month is peter rollins, who is a founder of the ikon community in northern ireland, a philosophical theologian who is deeply intrigued with the emergent church and the author of how (not) to speak of God. in how (not) to speak of God peter provocatively exposes the theoretical foundations of the emergent church and explores how the ikon community has sought to innovatively commend and incarnate the God about whom we can never speak definitively, but should never stop speaking.*

in short, this is one cohort gathering you will not want to miss. if you'd like to know a little more about peter rollins, check out this short interview at paracletepress.com. if you are interested at picking up a discounted copy of how (not) to speak of God you can pick one up at the gathering. if you live in another city and are interested in hearing Peter speak, check out his additional speaking dates. and, lastly, if you have any questions about our gathering, contact jeff at gentry13@gmail.com.

* the latter clause in this confounded sentence was inspired by peter's writing but is not a direct quote.

do you love me?

if so, protect me from the ravages of consumerism and support one of my deepest passions by purchasing this for me:



for the record, i am a little pissed that they did not include the games of the NLCS in this set like they included the 2004 ALCS in the red sox set, but i will still be an incomplete person without this product.

thank you for your patronage and may God Bless America.

jeffrey gentry: this is your life!



last night, at five minutes until five, i took a call on the customer service line. receiving such calls at five 'til five is almost always a mistake. this was no exception. this morning, i mined our electronic transcripts in order to transcribe the call. it went something like this.

jg, c.s.s.: "thank you for calling sentimental somethings this is jeff."

customer: "hello jeff, this is deborah jo at the fuchsia feline. i am calling because...oh gawd! mr. fish! mr. fish! mr. fish! my fish just jumped out of his bowl and is wrigglin' on the floor. oh gawd!"

jg, c.s.s.:

deborah jo:: "i've gotta save him, but i don't wanna touch him. oh, oh, EWWWW! mr. fish, don't die. don't die.

he was so rubbery, but at least i saved him."

jg, c.s.s.: "so are you following up on a damage claim or checking your order status?"

before i forget i would like to admit…

that in the workplace i am a detail oriented, task driven, motivated mother(bleep)er. i work well with people are committed to working hard and getting the job done and i disdain people who either do not have their (bleep) together or laze the day away. in addition, in regards to inter office communication, i communicate in a clear, carefully considered, matter of fact manner. i neither speak inappropriately to my coworkers or pussy foot around potential problems. i will not disregard people’s errors or ignore failure to meet minimal standards in order to protect someone’s feelings. if you are looking for someone who will overlook your errors in order to protect your emotions watch.(bleep)ing.oprah. the miracle of syndication has ensured that she is easily accessible.

in other news, last night, after talking to josh jackaway about his mega-church experience and peppering him with questions for four hours, i realized that i am still utterly fascinated with every form of church. occasionally someone will openly wonder whether my participation in a home church is simply a revolt against and/or critique of the mega-church. let me assure you that it is not. i did not give my life to serve the home church in particular but to serve the catholic church writ large. thus, i am constantly fascinated by the variety of ways that people proclaim the gospel of Jesus, incarnate Christ’s Kingdom and pursue God’s mission in this world. of course, that does not mean that any form is beyond critique.

ever since the cardinals won the world series i have not taken off my team gear, stopped reading recaps of the series and pouring over the pictures in sports illustrated’s world series edition. after so many years of post season frustration i am utterly amazed that the cardinals are the world champions. i am planning to write about my world series experience in the near future and, for frugality’s sake, am forever grateful that i do not live anywhere near the cardinals team store.

overheard

i'm following montgomery brewster's advice today by voting for "NONE OF THE ABOVE!"* however, that does not mean that i am disinterested in political issues and the general direction of our country. i've stumbled across a couple of excellent pieces about politics and evangelical interactions in politics lately that i would like to share.

first, i recently finished state of denial, which is the third volume in bob woodward's bush at war series. there are so many things that i could say about this rather massive tome, but i will limit my loquaciousness by offering a few blunt, opinionated reflections:

1) according to woodward, donald rumsfield has almost completely ignored the joint chief's perspectives on the military actions in iraq and in afghanistan. this has led to our almost criminally deficient deployments of troops and has shielded the executive branch from the realistic assessments of the soldiers in the field.

2) i had no idea that bush pushed out one of america's finest soldiers out of the secretary of state role so that he could employ an over-matched russianist who had failed to effectively fulfill her last government post. i have to agree with george herbert walker bush when he states that condi is a "real disappointment."

3) on account of either his natural optimism or his absolute belief in his failed foreign policy, bush has never wavered from his decision to invade iraq and will probably never authorize a strategic retreat from that morass. in this volume, bush is portrayed as a good natured, energetic, political fundamentalist. i suspect that this portrayal would have been more nuanced had bush agreed to be interviewed for this work like he allowed himself to be interviewed for plan of attack.

second, kellie forwarded me this excellent article by wheaton alumnus and former bush speechwriter michael gershon, in which the author suggests some healthy ways forward concerning a new "faith-based agenda." gershon's conception focuses more on global poverty and health issues that internal, american social issues and he suggests a manner in which candidates on both sides of the aisle can learn to connect with american christians who are no longer solely concerned with prayer in schools, idols in state courthouses and abortion.

third, andy crouch conducted an intriguing interview with former faith based initiatives staffer david kuo concerning kuo's new work tempting faith. crouch is his cantankerous, contrarian self in this interview and works hard to uncover kuo's intentions concerning this work. the result is an edgy, informative interview which talks about such issues as evangelical naivete in american politics and the need for evangelicals to undergo training and perhaps even a type of political ordination before heading into the partisan fray.

finally, gordon macdonald offers some helpful reflections concerning the haggard scandal and hints at the dangers of evangelical political accommodation.

* if you are tempted to lecture me about my democratic responsibilities please refrain. i think quite a bit about politics, but usually (i.e., when bush is not running for president) refrain from voting in local, state or national elections. i would like to think that my tendencies are rooted in the anabaptist tradition, but there is a good chance my choice is the result of my deep cynicism concerning the political process and/or appalling apathy.

mid-morning time waster

last night, while listening to all things considered on the way back from my proctologist’s office, i heard a clip of president bush at a rally in florida* proclaim: “we do have a plan for victory in iraq. and part of that plan is keeping congress in republican control.”

today’s pressing question: was this statement more or less ridiculous than the following statements?

“the detroit tigers' biggest obstacle to a championship will be keeping a straight face. the tigers in three. (OK, make it four.)” – bob nightingale in his world series preview that was published in usa today

“i did not have sexual relations with that woman, ms. lewinsky.” – president clinton publicly denying a particularly tawdry expression of executive privilege

“i never had a gay relationship with anybody, and i'm steady with my wife. i'm faithful to my wife.” - ted haggard on november 3, 2006

"i think they're in the last throes, if you will, of the insurgency." – dick cheney as quoted on june 20, 2005

* which charlie crist, florida’s republican candidate for governor, declined to attend lest bush’s “popularity” rub off on him.

concerning swaggart part deux

i have little doubt that most of you have heard the allegations that ted haggard, the pastor of new life church in colorado springs and the president of the national association of evangelicals, has been accused of soliciting sex and using methamphetamines. as will samson said so well in this post this is a tragic situation that will profoundly affect everyone involved.

i'm not going to use this event as a launching pad for a sermon lamenting the oppressive expectations of superficial righteousness that we place upon evangelical pastors, though i definitely could, but i cannot help but utter one note of lament.

in response to this tragedy, which is bound to have a profound effect upon haggard's wife and five children, the 15,000 members of new life church and evangelicals who have been influenced by haggard's leadership at the NAE, james dobson offered the following statements on cnn.com:

"It is unconscionable that the legitimate news media would report a rumor like this based on nothing but one man's accusation," Dobson said in a written statement issued before haggard's leave was announced.

"Ted Haggard is a friend of mine, and it appears someone is trying to damage his reputation as a way of influencing the outcome of Tuesday's election -- especially the vote on Colorado's marriage-protection amendment, which Ted strongly supports," Dobson said.

so apparently, according to dobson, the primary cause of this tragic event is the liberal media and the primary consequences will be political.

as if we needed further evidence that dr. dobson just doesn't get it.

as will sampson reminded us, let us continue to pray for ted haggard's family, congregation and the well-being of his accuser.

reader/response

the most recent edition of next-wave features an excellent review of Jesus of Suburbia by dustin bagby and an intriguing article entitled dear emergents by indiana wesleyan professor keith drury. in the latter article professor drury commends the emergent church for its missional orientation, abiding idealism and mystical theology. however, he also offers two words of caution as well.

since the second caution effectively summarizes one of my own deepest concerns about emergent i'm posting it in hopes that you will read and respond.

Keep the church. You are going to be tempted to abandon the church and go off into solitary spirituality. Your crushed idealism may cause you to give up on the assembled people of God and our culture’s individualism will entice you toward your iPod rather than worship on Sunday mornings. There will be voices recruiting you to leave the church—reversing the notion of “called out ones” to being called out of the church to an individualized privatized spirituality. I pray you will not listen to these temptations. Be wary of any who claim to “love Jesus but despise the church.” Refuse to walk away from the assembly of believers into a privatized self-centered spirituality. If you are practicing privatized faith on your own apart from the assembly you are not being a Christian at all—you merely practicing spiritual masturbation. There is no such thing as a solitary Christian any more than a solitary marriage. Christians come in clusters. I hope you emergents will reinvent all kinds of new ways for the church to be the church, but none of them should include a church-less Christianity. For a church-less Christianity is essentially a Christ-less Christianity and thus not Christian at all. To be prepared for this temptation read Bonhoeffer.

overheard: cardinals apologize for winning world series


ST. LOUIS—Calling Friday night's victory on baseball's grandest stage "a terrible mistake," members of the St. Louis Cardinals issued a formal apology for making the playoffs, winning the World Series, and depriving baseball fans everywhere of a season featuring the kind of heartwarming, storybook ending to which they have grown accustomed in recent years. continue reading