Friday, February 22, 2008

daddy day care

this live blog is brought to you by a demanding mother. i'm not saying exactly which mother that is, but rest assured it is one who holds certain keys to the kingdom of the writer.

anyway, people in massachsetts, as noted previously, people in massachusetts are remarkably delusional about snow. for this reason, i am home with little p and he is in the process of destroying the house. those of you who know him need little proof of the latter assertion, those who don't can look at the picture below.

while preston is in the process of destroying the kitchen, daddy takes a moment to tackle another task. namely, cleaning diapers. daddy returns to find baby playing amidst the cleaning chemicals, but instead of redirecting baby, he resets the family wireless router so that he can post this violently compelled piece.

daddy can't find a way to post to the left of the two latter pictures. that pisses daddy off.

in the brief moments that daddy has not been working, spending time with family, studying for his final seminary class and serving up the scraps to the church, he's been celebrating lent. in the midst of this important season of preparation for the resurrection, daddy has been repenting of his recent passion for speaking like rickey henderson and practicing little spiritual disciplines such as reading a devotional and participating in abbreviated prayer and fasting. daddy hopes that the Father is as pleased with these tiny offerings of devotion as the Son was with the widows mite.

while reading the bread and wine devotional during lent, he ran across the following quote:

"...Jesus was not brought down by atheism and anarchy. He was brought down by law and order allied with religion, which is always a deadly mix. Beware of those who claim to know the mind of God and who are prepared to use force, if necessary, to make others conform. Beware of those who cannot tell God's will from their own." ~ Barbara Brown Taylor in Truth to Tell

daddy thinks about how the previous quote throws bright light on so many christians from martin luther on, but baby is pissed about being ignored and daddy cannot finish his reflection.

daddy and preston make their way out to the library where daddy plans to renew his lease on the book of buechner - which is fantastic - and hopes to pick up season one, disc one of battlestar gallactica. daddy knows that the later series sounds like a geek's wet dream,* but he can't watch FNL anymore, does not have ready access to the fifth season of the wire and needs something new to watch while he irons.

when daddy and preston get to the library it is, quite predictably, closed. daddy thinks most librarians are weak sauce,** quick to skip and eager to bitch. on account of the proceeding factors, daddy shakes his fist in anger. since he can't pick up battlestar daddy calls uncle cade to see if he will loan out his netflix copy of michael clayton. uncle cade agrees and little p and daddy head down pond street.

on the way we check in on the pigeon man's "rollers." daddy is relieved that at least one local species adapts to snow quite easily.

little p and daddy arrive at uncle cade's only to find him in standard repose. note to aunt becky: uncle cade and bella are fairing quite well.*** daddy tells uncle cade that there will be spaghetti at the gentry house tonight, picks up the dvd and leaves.

on the way home little p decides to play in the street. he seems to enjoy himself...

until the plow pushes by.

after shaking off the snow and removing gear daddy plies preston with juice, a relatively rare treat, because daddy might feel guilty about kicking snow in preston's face and is eager to end this narcissistic picture post.

meanwhile, as daddy is exchanging quality time with his son in hopes of completing the post, preston crawls into the bathroom and has a little too much fun with the shit sprayer.

FINALLY daddy snaps this last shot,**** wonders whether he will ever slap up a post that is wholly devoid of sexual humor and we eagerly await mommy's impending return.

thank you for putting up with us.

* and by wet he means snow. get your head out of the gutter and get with this post's overarching theme.
** excepting librarians who are related to, friends with or attend church alongside of daddy. librarians who tee it up like that are probably pretty ok too.
*** though rumor has it that there is no longer ice cream in aunt becky's freezer.
**** note the rally cap. something tells me we're going sporting that look more often than not this season.

Monday, February 18, 2008

overheard: a plea for the revitalization of evangelical ethics*

reporter: andy, anyone who follows you and knows you realizes that you are a man of faith. can you talk about how your faith influenced your decision to use HGH and maybe how your faith has sustained you during this hard time?

pettitte: i felt like it was the right thing to do in my heart. that might be hard for some to far as my faith, i felt good about it when i started. but then i felt bad once i started far as how my faith has sustained me through all this, i know in my heart why i did things. i've tried to live my life in a certain way and i know i'll have to stand before God some day.

reporter: andy, can you tell us how you felt using it a second time? you've explained how bad it made you feel the first time, so why did you take it a second?

pettitte: i felt stupid, and desperate.

* please note: the text above is a summary and should not be read as an exact quote. i tried to correctly record the question and response while the press conference was taking place. i apologize for any errors.