Saturday, February 16, 2008

overheard: welcome to heritage u.s.a. II!

i just clicked over to stltoday.com to check in on the happenings in jupiter and was blessed to see that brother jim bakker is celebrating the dedication of heritage u.s.a. II! brother bakker has long since repented of his embrace of the prosperity gospel, but fortunately god has still seen fit to provide him with another sprawling ministry center which not only features affordable, god-breathed real estate, a beautiful enclosed shopping center that features "italianate store facades and condo balconies" and a magnificent chapel from which the word of god will be gloriously transmitted six times a week!

anybody interested in splitting a heritage u.s.a. II lifetime partnership with me? i've heard that for only $1,000.00 we can stay at one of the new italian style condos for up to four weeks a year!

seriously, i hope if/when the sulfur o' sodom falls, heritage u.s.a. II is ground zero. this wonderful new work of god makes me sick to my stomach and ashamed to be an evangelical christian. read some of the testimonies in stltoday's article of the former "lifetime partners" who lost $1,000.00 in forfeited "lifetime partnership" dues when heritage I collapsed, yet are all fired up and eager to invest in bakker's new work. i suppose one will never go broke underestimating the intelligence of bible belt christians. grrr...

11 comments:

Agent B said...

Sad, sad testimony to the masses.

But on the bright side, I did have a beer at the same table with that guy's son.

Whatever.

g13 said...

of course it's also a sad, sad testimony to my faith that i get so worked up about elmer gantrys from my own backyard but know little, and speak out less for the oppressed and impoverished people throughout the world.

Christ have mercy.

Anonymous said...

I could be wrong but I think Bakker was there for a dedication or something. Rick Joyner/Morningstar seems to be the group heading up this thing.

Cheers.

g13 said...

hey nathan, thanks for stopping by. the article says that a real-estate developer named jerry crawford owns the place, but that he's using bakker as his main attraction.

from my perspective, whether bakker owns it or not it really not significant. what sickens me is the whole consumeristic portrait of christianity that "communities" like morningstar and "ministries" like bakker's paint. in the midst of the article it talks about a retired nurse from canada who is buying a three bedroom home in morningside for $300,000. can you imagine paying that amount for a home in southwestern missouri? i sure as hell cannot!

i'm also a little sensitive about these matters because i grew up in tulsa, ok, the undisputed home of the prosperity gospel and the christian subculture. so take it for what it's worth and thank you again for stopping by.

Mike Murrow said...

people people people! we are loosing sight of what an opportunity this is...

We can pool our money and send Cade and Beck there for the honeymoon!

Mike Murrow said...

HOLY CRAP! You should warn people before they click on that link. I spit coffee out of my nose and all over the computer.

That is freaking AWESOME! I can't wait to show that to the roommates. Or maybe the next time someone tries to reconvert me to the faith I will just tell them I have found a church and point them in that direction.

RE: heckling. Let me give it some thought. I would seriously consider a trip down there just for that. You know we would make it on CNN.

Mike Murrow said...

damn. have you read any of the other articles on that thing?

i love the one about anal that recomends it as a contraceptive.

if i had know that site existed i would have stayed in the faith longer!

now i am thinking about rejoining E-harmoney. no wonder all those guys in the comercials seem so happy to be married to those homely women. they all have found that site!

Mike Murrow said...

yeah, i said homely. bring it on.

g13 said...

i've read or listened to most of the articles on the site because dr. james utilized the site as our text for last thursday's bible study. they're appropriate lenten passages, don't you think?

as for the heckling, i'd be happy to join you. that is one reason i'd be willing to return to branson. of course, scheduling the date might be a little difficult.

Ariah said...

very sad, and sick

g13 said...

yes, and most undoubtedly yes.

for the record, i have removed a little of the filth flarn filth from the comments section. some links should be allowed for only so long and other links should not be allowed at all.

pax.