Thursday, August 03, 2006

mid-morning time waster

if smoking pot was legal, you did not have any moral objections to the practice, it was your birthday (so you really deserved a treat) and you could only smoke up with three people…who would you choose?*

this is the question that has been vexing a certain 32 year old grumpy old man and myself for a little over a week and we’d love for you to join in the conversation. we welcome any and all responses, but think it would be fun if you chose your three fellow deviants from one particular field (i.e., musicians, writers, reality t.v. show contestants, etc).

since i am (an admittedly misanthropic) minister, i’ll share the three religious figures i would love to smoke up with.

number one on my list is st. francis of assisi. i realize that in the late medieval period in upper umbria sharing a water pipe was not a recreational option. however, if it was i have little doubt that francis, with his love of mystical experience and the natural world, would be more than willing to share a few loose joints with me. the mere idea of lolling on the hillside of assisi, smoking with francis and sharing the secrets of our inner life (i would have to ask about the nature of his affection for Claire) makes me get a little misty.

my second would be the pride of lowell, massachusetts, jack kerouac. although jack is not specifically a religious figure, he was intrigued by buddhism and once defined beat writing in as a means of being “sympathetic” to the common man. i think that definition applies equally well to Jesus’ ministry and i would love to take a hit with jack and listen to his stream-of-consciousness ramblings as we jumped a freight train or hitched our way out west.

malcom’s own depictions of his hep-cat days in boston as well as the remarkable reactions he had against his youth suggest that rolling one with him in his early days, strapping on a zoot and maybe heading down to the city to see ella fitzgerald would have been interesting.

my buddy and I hope you can take a moment to share your list.

* for the record, i: have not smoked pot in over a decade, realize that this post will make a few people more than a little uncomfortable (hi mom!) and am fairly certain that this would be a piece of damning evidence against any candidacy for a traditional church job. but, i’m bored, don’t have the time to write anything meaningful and, at the moment anyway, could care less about the consequences.


Agent B said...

Other than maybe a couple of beers or a strong coffee, I hate being altered. I don't even like asperin.

So I probably wouldn't smoke. But I get your jist.

My pick: (don't care for any famous people now)...

dr. james
and fletch

and maybe a few others from this blog world.

g13 said...

yeah, i probably wouldn't smoke either.

seth said...

i love the idea of st francis. i would have to add st bridgett to that. and steve carrell.

Dave said...

wow, what a great question. i too have not smoked pot for nearly a decade, but let's just say it was my favorite thing to in life. i would have to pick my wife, because she never has, but i will still pick three to join us:

Martin Luther
Robin Williams

all five of us would be passing around in this order (with translation included for those unaware): a bong (=water filtration device), a blunt (=stuff rolled in an emptied out Phillies Blunt cigar), a bone (=joint), and a bowl (=pipe)

james said...

B -

pour us a couple o' pints. I'd love to be in that circle!

cade said...

31, man. 31. "your buddy" ain't THAT old.

in no particular order (importance or chronological):

1) ben folds
2) george harrison
3) benjamin franklin

honorable mention:
snoop dogg

cade said...

...and for the record. no, mom, i haven't ever.

junkyardlove said...

First and foremost, I'd have to say my husband because he's never been, but moreso because I bet he'd have even cooler shit to write and say when he was high. We always talk about how we'd like to smoke up with a certain beloved LCC prof. THAT'd rule.

Then there are people I'd like to participate with b/c we'd laugh so hard and have so much fun (Leanne, Julia, Carrie, Lynn, Shelly). But then with some others like My younger Brother, Wilcox, Brian, Soebs, we'd have crazy deep, artful convos. This is hard.

As far as "famous" The top person would be Rich Mullins. Then, other people I thought of:

Adam Duritz
J. Depp
Jane Kenyon

g13 said...

whaaat j, you don't want to gets high with me?

the rich idea is a great one. though i'm sure a righteous CCM star like him never smoked up.

junkyardlove said...

But gentry, we've already toked together, dude...

Haha. Nah, I just assumed you were a given when I posted my lists.

Mike said...

first, if it were legal i most certainly would.

second, seeing that the theme of "religious" folk was abandoned i feel the need to bring us back to that theme, not including folks like DrJ, Old Man Cade, G,AB, and so on:

Martin Luther
St Frank

brian said...


this is harder than i thought. i really want to be creative and original but you guys already stole most of mine. without daring to duplicate . . . here's my list


as well as most of you who already commented . . .

g13 said...

mr. rogers. that's kind of cool.

three fictional characters i would love to smoke up with.

margot tennenbaum
fred and george weasley
ray kinsella

ahbahsean said...


Michael Landon
Tim Burton
Robert Downey Jr.

(but not if RDJ ends up back in rehab as a result then I'm going to replace him with my dad.)

g13 said...

michael landon?! congratulations becky, that's the weirdest response yet.

ahbahsean said...

My sisters and I used to play the 'see how long it takes Pa to cry' watching Little House game. Wouldn't that game be more fun in person?... i think so.

junkyardlove said...

Becky, that's so weird and funny that you chose Landon. I was totally going to put him down as a smartass answer.