memorandum from captain random:
apparently i have a (not so) secret admirer. after years of longing for my sweet love m.s. laird has finally made her affection public. if i only wasn't married, sweet mary sue, if only i wasn't married. mary sue opens her heart at iheartjeff.blogspot.com.
ever since i equated the current tumult at calvary church in charlotte (where my good friend and s & s alumnus jon wise works) with an inquisition, scenes and songs from mel brooks' history of the world, part I have been rattling 'round in my head. if you know it, sing along with me, "the inquisition, isn't it exciting?" (by the way, if any of the inquisitors from calvary have migrated over to this blog, please know that i am prone to say fuck, shit, damn, asshole, hell, postmodern, westwinds, paul allen and emergent. moreover, i am not interested in exalting rational argumentation, i like to speak of inspiration instead of innerancy, i am a rabid supporter of the separation between church and state and i don't read norman geisler's books. thus, i am completely unclean and will make sure that the next time i visit calvary i vocally identify myself as such. i wouldn't want any of y'all to get infected with what i have).
if you're wondering "how much is that doggie in the window," let me assure you that she is completely free. if you loved "pound puppies" and don't mind finding shit on the floor, dizzy may be the dog for you! please, serious inquiries only.
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6 comments:
Coenring the 3 postings...
1. What the hell?
Who has that much time? James?
2. What is going on there? Is this one of those coffee and candles churches that are still frightenly modern (Modern wolf in emerging clothes)? How is Jon?
3. Stick with it. We almost gave marley away a couple of times in the first few months (after he destroyed a quilt, cashmere sweater, our rug at the front entrance, etc.). We are glad we kept him. Even though some nights we want to leave him outside.
Aww, I think the love Ms. Laird seems to have for you is sweet.
rick,
1. mary sue has tons of time. for further evidence check out her personal blog at http://agirlcalledjamie.blogspot.com.
2. jon is suffering through a staff cleansing at calvary. from what i've seen, norman geisler is whipping up all sorts of fury against "postmodernity" and is calling people back to the (modern) foundations of the Christian faith. it seems like the elders have been trying to oust paul allen, who is the executive pastor, and his hires and compatriots for quite some time. they've been giving jon hell about talking negatively about the church on his blog and using the "F" word on two different occasions. he's really having a tough go of it down there.
3. we're not letting the dog go. even if she shat in my office this morning and i found a pool in the same place when i returned home for lunch.
Not even I have that much time. I'm buried in Church History at the moment.
for the record, i'm glad that mary sue has extra time on her hands. otherwise she wouldn't be able to produce the finger paintings that hang on my fridge.
Ms. Laird is so open about her love. It's heartwarming.
Love,
Fiona, Sally, and various other women
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