Friday, October 06, 2006

memorandum from captain random

unfortunately i do not have time to post anything meaningful today, so i’m going to regularly assault you with meaningless drivel instead. enjoy.

if you love me, you’ll buy me greg boyd’s a myth of a christian nation. i know that a number of you hate boyd’s theological conceptions, but i’ve had the opportunity to connect with this man personally and can confirm that he has an incredible passion for the gospel and pastoral heart. i’ve also heard that he lost upwards of 1,000 members of his congregation after preaching on the sermons that inspired this new book. that takes balls. so even if this book is a rehash of yoder and hauwerwas i want to read it.


last night, while brushing my teeth and getting ready for bed, i realized that the two Christ-followers that i relate with most are godric from buechner’s spectacular novel by the same name and the whisky priest from graham greene’s the power and the glory. the first figure slept with his sister and founds his most intimate communion with snakes and the second lived a rather luxurious life that was built on the backs of his peasant parishioners. although there is much to loathe about these two figures, both of them were carried along by the sustenance of the sacraments and a certain, inescapable sense of holiness (for the priest this holiness rested in the exaltation and administration of eucharist. godric found that this holiness was etched upon and administered through his hands) that attracted people to them and served as their primary means of blessing the world. i feel much the same way insofar as there is much to loathe about my pessimistic, misanthropic and mostly hidden self, yet i have been capture by the inescapable and inestimable beauty, truth and goodness of Jesus Christ’s life and, for some reason, feel compelled to share the stumbling journey of discipleship with others. i suppose that my purpose would be clearer and my ministry would be more metrically satisfying if i related with rick warren or bill hybels. but there you go.

i crossed a line in the sand last night when i chose not to watch my name is earl, which, along with the office, cade lovingly recorded for me, so that i would have the eighth episode of the wire. if you haven’t caught the wire yet and you’re into law and order type television, you’re really missing out. although he makes some poor decisions, such as having his elementary school children perform ad hoc surveillance on a dangerous drug dealer and drinking more than mel gibson on the sabbath, i’m beginning to suspect that detective mcnulty is my new hero.

one of the strange things about spending 40-45 hours a week in an office environment is realizing how often people talk about the same damn thing over and over and over. i have a co-worker who has been talking about her impending move to georgia for at least one hour a day for eight months. her husband’s contract work here in the commonwealth has been extended yet again, meaning i am going to hear about “how nice people are” in georgia and details about every amenity in her house for yet another month. she’s a nice person and i don’t mind working with her, but i wish she would stop turning back to the same damn subject like a broken record. on the bright side, now that i’ve endured her repetitious stories for eight months, i can empathize with dr. james, holli-brooke and the pixie who have hear my shopworn jokes and my ragged edged tirades time and again. in the end, i’m utterly amazed that any of us put up with each other.

as reported elsewhere cade and i went to see high fidelity: the musical on tuesday night. although the first fifteen minutes completely sucked – which means death for sermons, operatic voice pieces and, i fear, musicals – the rest of the first half sucked less so and the second half was rollicking if not balls-to-the-wall fun. i thought cade’s critique of the guy who played rob was spot-on and his trumpeting of christian anderson, who played dick to incredibly poignant and comedic effect, as the scene stealer of the show was spot-on. i would also add that the girl who played liz has a sass that is electric, but unfortunately cannot sing, and the way the second half of the score ironically references and subsequently apes musical genre (there is an excellent lyle lovett inspired tune called, fittingly, “i slept with someone who slept with lyle lovett”) is brilliant. all in all, once i endured the painful first fifteen minutes (which included lines that were almost straight out of the book, but not quite. i.e., “my records are not organized alphabetically or chronologically but, wait for it, autobiographically;” “some people will never get over the night their band opened for radiohead.” i almost wanted to scream, if you are going to use the source material, don’t alter it in such stupid ways!) i had a really great time. in sum, high fidelity is a half-great and altogether good musical.

the pixie and i are going to see scorcese’s new flick the departed this evening. know that kellie has wanted to see this film for some time, so i’m thinking it should be considered a worthy substitute for the chick flicks that she often wants me to see with her. should it count or not? help us out here.

hey cade, sorry i’m stepping out on you concerning the departed. the globe finally reviewed high fidelity and you can find the article here.


the best movie almost no one is watching:




the pixie and i had the opportunity to see half nelson a couple of weeks ago and i really enjoyed it. the movie follows the story of mr. dunne, an idealistic inner city school teacher, and drey, his favorite student and confidante. throughout the movie mr. dunne is trying to teach his eighth grade history students the theory of dialectics in hopes that they will understand the changes that have taken place in history and hopefully participate in social movements to come. the primary irony of the film is that although mr. dunne is obsessed with change on a social and political level, he cannot see any significant changes in his life. his personal stasis is particularly problematic because he is not only a dedicated inner city school teacher, but also an unrepentant crack head. as the friendship between mr. dunne and drey slowly unfolds one keeps hoping that their friendship will bring change to the rather precarious states of both of their lives. yet, as the movie so eloquently shows, we can rarely predict the people and events that will entice, entreat or even force us to change. moreover, sometimes we have to wonder whether change will ever occur at all. half nelson is not an inspiring movie, but it is, in my opinion at least, an incredibly true movie insofar as it both reminds us of both the potential for and our relative inability to engineer change. i think a lot of preachers, counselors, parents and anyone else who is infinitely invested in the lives of others would really benefit from seeing this film that reminds us that, ultimately, change is out of our hands and, hopefully, is in God’s.

hug it out bitch!

this weekend j & b celebrate 6 years of marriage. kudos to them! i would love to commend their union as one of the best examples of the beauty, truth and goodness that i have ever seen and at the same time remind people that often things don't work out quite that well.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

further evidence that (former felon) charles colson is losing his mind

on charles colson and prison fellowships'* blog gina dalfonzo reminds us that the real tragedy of the mark foley scandal is not that he sought to sexually abuse young boys or that the republican leadership apparently overlooked such charges in order to sustain their political hegemony. nope, the real scandal is how the liberal media is using this scandal to bring down the god-fearing, flag waving, fag hating republican party.

i'm tempted to disagree with dalfonzo's assessment that i've posted below, but i'm sure that if we knew all the information that the republican leaders did about this scandal we would realize that their protection of foley and their counterspin against the "so called liberal media" was really in the best interests of god, country and, of course, homeland security.

"It's too early, I suppose, to know the whole truth for certain. At this stage, all we know is that it appears that someone knew something and kept quiet temporarily for reasons of their own. Until everything comes out -- and in this politically charged climate, maybe it never will -- should we say anything at all? Maybe not much, but I think there's at least one thing we can and should say with certainty. It used to go without saying among grown-ups that the exploitation of children and teenagers for any reason -- including wanting to retain power or wanting to overthrow those in power -- is a complete and utter disgrace. Apparently, it no longer does go without saying. Because whoever knew and withheld this information for their own purposes is morally just as guilty as Mark Foley."

* let us hope that this web site is not attached to their 501C3 tax deductible organization. if it is, their exemption should be challenged.

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

don't look now but...



we're on the verge of having an intriguing conversation about the evangecube. if you have a minute, please take a moment to read the original post and dive into the dialogue. i'd like to thank brian - who works for the parent company of evangecube - for re-initiating the conversation and dave, danny, et. al for their responses.
mid-morning time waster: the high fidelity edition



tonight at 8 pm cade and i are heading down to the big, bad city to see high fidelity: the musical. since i am a huge nick hornby fan – i think he is one of the wittiest and unexpectedly humane novelists on the planet – and i believe that both the novel and the movie version of high fidelity offered us perhaps the most striking portrait of 20 something, white, western males (circa 1997 anyway), i am a little bit nervous about this production.

cade’s take is that we will have a great time whether the musical is excellent or awful, for if it is excellent it will provide an effective vehicle for the proclamation of the gospel of high fidelity to the masses* and if it is awful we can openly ridicule it during the performance and in our post-curtain recap.**

anyway, in honor of tonight’s premier, I would like for us to spend a few moments penning a few lyrics for the new musical. that way, if the songs suck, we can provide the writers with both healthy critique and provocative suggestions. here are the lyrics i’ve penned thus far.*** feel free to edit my lyrics or provide lyrics of your own.

“sarah, sarah,
schizophrenia's in your eyes,
your eyes
oh sarah, sarah,
you broke my heart when you said goodbye
goodbye
sarah, sarah,
now i could bag you without having to try
to try”

"charlie, you f*cking bitch,
you sucked his d*ck
the dreaded MARCO!

charlie, open the door
you stupid whore
let’s work it out!”

“what came first,
the music or the misery?
first yoko busted up the beatles,
now laura says she's leaving me.”


* i’m not joking about this “gospel” label, nor do i take the term lightly. i have personally witnessed the movie version serve as a sort of sacrament for ex-girlfriends and consider anything that can explain my neuroses, make people laugh about my relational inabilities and maybe even release me from a little personal responsibility an absolute gift from God.

** for my part, i am committed to booing and scoffing at the piece during the performance if it sucks. if my experience sucks, i suppose everyone else’s should as well.

*** if you find these lyrics a little raunchy and in bad taste, blame hornsby. each line i’ve penned is inspired by lines in the book or in the musical.

Monday, October 02, 2006

i say it best, when i say nothing at all

this year the pixie and i spent the saturday before easter in one of our favorite places, columbus, ohio. before the pixie capitulated to my desire to marry her, she served with xenos - an enormous columbus-based cell-church that has an incredible campus ministry, is equipping hundreds of young people with the biblical and practical skills they need to lead transformational communities and, in the end, completely defies description – and we love to re-connect with that incredible community and revisit the streets and sights that provided the context for our courtship as often as possible.

anyway, on saturday night paul and becky alexander surprised us by cooking up a huge dinner and filling the house with our old xenos friends. sometime after dinner, while sitting out on the alexander’s porch with paul, ryan and aaron we began to discuss the theology and mission of the church. after one of the guys seemed to short-change the ministry of martin luther king by suggesting that his efforts to secure civil rights and tireless advocacy on behalf of the poor had less eternal significance than simply “sharing the gospel,” i openly challenged his limited definition of the gospel and thus fulfilled my part-time role as theological provocateur.

as our conversation continued i could not help but be overwhelmed by pure, unmitigated passion these dear brothers had for sharing the liberating gospel of Jesus with others. every time we visit our friends at xenos they are a part of a new home church, because their last church incorporated so many new people into the body of Christ that they outgrew their meeting space. moreover, nearly every time i hang out with xenoids I meet another young man or woman that they are educating and mentoring in hopes that this person will help lead one of the next wave of home churches. xenos’ passion for evangelism and church planting is absolutely contagious. so much so, in fact, that i often leave columbus wondering what i’m doing wrong.

while i am proud of what sinners and saints has accomplished over the past four years and am constantly amazed by the intriguing ways that our s & s alumnus are pursuing the Kingdom of God throughout the country, i cannot deny the fact that our little community has never been all that effective at inviting others to receive the grace of God and participate in the life of Jesus in this brief time before the renewal of all things.* i don’t say that to either deride our community, which i love deeply, nor to deny the fact that we have seen a couple of wonderful people incorporated into the body of Christ over the past four years. rather, i simply mention that fact because it is true.

i mention all of this because i pondered this truth while sitting on the alexander’s porch, and, in my own way, confessed to the guys that i would like to share both their unmitigated passion for proclamation and certainty regarding their theology and missiology. however, as it was, i had to confess that i simply did not see gospel ministry as having such a singular focus on evangelism, my ever-evolving theology made me leery of propositional evangelism** and my diverse ecclesiology has led to a little church that, while undoubtedly vibrant, is probably not the most well-defined landing place.***

all of this to say, i wish i could tell you that i have “one pure and holy passion,” but i don’t. i am passionate about a number of things, including proclaiming the good news, incarnating Jesus’ compassion and creating alternative communities and none of these passions can claim primacy over the other. but although i cannot reduce my mission to a singular goal,**** i can work a lot harder at doing the things i love and spend a lot less time worrying and toiling at things i hate. i suppose that’s more than enough musing about my personal mission. it’s time to get on it.


* i suppose that instead of providing this wordy description i could have simply said “evangelism,” but i’d rather not.
** which these cats use to unquestionably great effect.
*** paul responded to my confession by suggesting that maybe my diverse experiences have made my mission all the more complicated. i suppose that might be true, but fear that my life would be far less meaningful without the diverse experiences i’ve enjoyed and even those i’ve simply endured.
**** anybody who suggests that i embrace a pithy statement from the westminster confession or a concept from john piper as my singular focus can expect to run a three legged race to the hospital (so that i can get my foot out of your ass).

Sunday, October 01, 2006

this just in: the cardinals win the war of attrition and steer clear on infamy

thank you bravos. thank you.