weird



while sleeping the mid-morning away i dreamed that i was attending a seminary wherein prospective ministers created sermons that explained the sexual perversity of their senior pastors, every ministerial candidate was required to take a counseling course that focused solely on divorce and the seminarian's children often climbed a plastic tower of babel that towered over spring-loaded lions and lambs and other biblically inspired playground equipment.

that would be one weird seminary, but not without worth.

ecclesiological musing

first off, i would like to wish everyone a merry christmas and a happy festivus for the rest of us.

for the past five days i've been visiting family and friends throughout oklahoma* and texas. by and large, my trip has been excellent. i've spent a good deal of time with family, found a long out-of-print baseball novel by mark winegardner and have reconnected with a number of old friends.**

it was one of the latter connections*** that sparked a suspicion that has been burning within me ever since. here's what happened: late last week i had a 'bucks breakfast with a friend that had recently left his position at a mega-church in a distant state for a number of reasons (principle among which was to honor his mother and father and, perhaps, find respite from the non-stop intensity of congregational church ministry). throughout our conversation, my friend spoke about his transition as "leaving the ministry." this term did not sit right with me from the outset since, as i reminded my friend, "any life of discipleship is a commitment to serve or minister to others. there's no getting around this commitment we made." my friend readily agreed with my assertion, yet throughout the conversation he continued to fall back into the pattern of speaking of his transition as though it was a disassociation from his calling. so that was the experience which sparked my suspicions.

the second experience took place last night at a beautiful christmas eve service here in amarillo. in the midst of a beautiful sermon concerning the rupture of the incarnation the preacher noted that the world is not any less dark or filled with war than it was at the time of the Savior's birth. however, he opined, "we know that Jesus did not come to put an end to war, but to save individual hearts and souls from sin." now, i realize that Jesus himself told us that we would hear of "wars and rumours of wars" until the time eternal breaks into the present time. moreover, i know he pleaded with communities full of broken individuals who were "weary and burdened" to come to Him and find rest. however, i do not think that the redemption that Jesus offers communities and the individuals involved in those communities is merely a bloody solution for individual sin. rather, i think that Jesus has redeemed communities of disciples so that we can rage against the darkness of war, poverty and oppression. one only need think of the Christ-infused, non-violent war that martin luther king lead against american apartheid or the, perhaps Christ-inspired, salt campaign that ghandi led against the british, to realize that such revolutions are possible.

anyway, this is a long winded way of saying that i suspect that evangelicalism throughout the south is laboring under an incipient gnosticism that is threatening to dull the reconciling and revolutionary power of the gospel.**** i fear that if we who are followers of Christ fail to work for, incite and experience reconciliation with one another and the re-creation of our communities now, we will never be able to fully enter into the impending fullness of the Kingdom of God that southern churches constantly proclaim.

so that's what i'm thinking about on the day we celebrate the long-awaited incarnation of Jesus Christ. i'd love to hear your response to and reflections upon these assertions.*****

* did you know that next year oklahoma is going to celebrate its centennial? i'm sure that will inspire raucous celebrations throughout the five indian nations that once called oklahoma their own. as i've noted before, in order to take the land oklahoma sits on away from a people group you have to be really intent on screwing them.
** including, this guy, whom i met for lunch at the mcdonald's over the highway in vinita, ok. glamorous.
*** not for this guy that i mentioned above, but that other guy i see from time to time.
**** for the record, i know that i am not the only one to make such observations about the south, but i've never seen the docetic (i.e., the dualistic form of gnosticism that seeks to completely bifurcate the spiritual truth from the fleshly reality) influence as clearly as i have on this trip. moreover, just to let you know that i'm not simply bashing upon my homeland, i'll freely admit that their are other historic christian heresies such as arianism that seem to blight the region i currently call home.
***** please note that they are, in fact, assertions about what i have observed in this particular place during this particular time. they are not in any way intended as accusations concerning a region and churches that i dearly love.

david sedaris as crumpet the christmas elf


this morning, on my way back from an early morning 'bucks meeting with an old friend, i heard david sedaris recount his experience as crumpet the christmas elf. i cannot tell you how refreshing it was to hear the stories of someone who is as tangled up in and hates christmas.*

i hope you can take a minute to listen to this hysterical story. the first person to identify my favorite crumpet punch line will receive one poo dollar.

* for the record, i really like advent. i don't mind a christmas that is preceded by a season of hopeful repentance. it's the christmases that are wrapped in credit card debt and horrific mall experiences that i totally abhor.

dear santa, thank you for dying for our gifts*



* many thanks to kidpositive for turning me on to a christmas story i'll be proud to share with my children.

for shits and grins

ministerial musing

the further i walk down this way the more confounded i become about my calling. i have no idea why God called such a sinner to serve His saints and i question whether i could ever proclaim with st. paul, “follow me as i follow Christ.”

fortunately, although i don’t have the depth of character that is expected of ministers and am one of the most relationally retarded people to ever enter pastoral ministry, i have not been left bereft of role models. as i continue upon this way, i resonate with the stories of graham greene’s whisky priest* and uncle freddy’s godric all the more.

as with the whisky priest, i am a vain, narcissistic man who is almost as fixated on my own interests as i am undone by the sacraments and the opportunity i have to share such gracious secrets with the world. moreover, like God’s wreck** i can sometimes feel God unfolding through my hands and it is on account of those rare emanations that i will never fully surrender to the sins of my flesh nor, i suspect, leave this life of embodied compassion and proclamation.

so there you go. rick warren has w.a. criswell, leighton ford had billy graham*** and i have godric and the whisky priest. i am so utterly thankful for these companions who, along with a surprisingly large contingent of three dimensional characters,**** are encouraging me to remain upon this way.

* his story is recounted in the power and the glory.
** this is one possible etymological root of the name Godric. or at least it might be. the latter character is, on regular occasion, completely full of shit. is it any wonder that i love him?
*** speaking of, if you want to have your heart completely broken, read this washington post article about bessie the cow, billy’s burial place and the striking hubris of the billy frank’s son.
**** in this midst of this horribly beautiful year, wherein God has focused on teaching me obedience through my sufferings, one of these friends admonished me in the midst of such discipline to “not loose all your rough edges.” “for that,” she continued, “is part of your charm.” such words, from such a woman, just about killed me.

the long-awaited return of your fired friend

over the past three weeks i have been pushing out resumes, updating ms office skills and watching far too much television. in the midst of my inertia, i haven't been writing all that much. so in an effort to update you, dear readers, on the minutiae of my life and circumvent writer's block i'm going to run a little online diary for the next four hours.

12:38 p.m.: hey there, sinners and saints. your fired friend is coming to you live from an undisclosed location in southeastern new hampshire where i am currently manning a switchboard for a well-known waste management company. i could tell you more about my current assignment, but then i'd have to kill you.

12:40: okay, okay, i relent. i can tell you that this facility administrates the distribution of nuclear waste throughout the pacific northwest and my primary job is to answer incoming calls from robotic telemarketers who call fifteen times a hour to whisper scintillating, spanish nothings in my ear and offer services that i dare not mention on this family-friendly sit. oh mama citas. if only i was single!

12:46: if you aren't watching friday night lights you should be ashamed of yourself. the show provides one of the most poignant pictures of small town life that i have ever seen. i want to write more about this show at a later date, but i will tell you this: at some point in almost every episode, i find myself on the verge of tears. i realize that the latter fact probably means little to the cry at hallmark commercials and lust for "oprah moments" set, but for me such expressions of emotion are rare. did i mention that you can watch every episode of friday night lights for free until january 3rd? there you go, you have no excuse.

1:11: in addition to hanging up on telemarketers i am beginning to suspect that my primary role at this undisclosed location is to hand out candy and willfully converse with nerds.

1:23: i'm in the midst of reading mark winegardner's the godfather's revenge and, as much as it pains me, i've got to say ehhh. i believe that winegardner is one of our finest writers (i.e., crooked river burning) and i love mario puzo and mob stories in general. however, i suspect that winegardner would be better served by creating works of his own invention rather than maintaining and expanding the storylines of others. that being said, it was a bit of a thrill to hear a mention of mikey z in another context.*

1:43: confession: i hate it when people ask me what i do for a living. i've always thought that i should be a professional and having to tell people that i work in customer service or i'm pimping by the hour just about kills me. i suppose i could tell them that i'm a bi-vocational minister, but what the hell does that mean to most people? sometimes, i don't even know what the latter term means myself.

1:46: in light of that confession i would like to thank God for his wholehearted commitment to my humility.

2:00: okay, i'm boring myself and focused on finishing this book. salut!

3:04: okay, now i'm bored with being bored, so it must be time for a list.

books i've read and enjoyed as of late: the mysteries of pittsburgh by michael chabon; fever pitch by nick hornby; friday night lights** by buzz bissinger; and how (not) to speak of God by peter rollins.

books i've cracked but could not seem to finish: the coast of akron*** by adrienne miller; no logo**** by naomi klein; and summerland by michael chabon.

currently on my lit list: a well-paid slave: curt flood's fight for free agency in professional sports by brad snyder; vera cruz blues by mark winegardner; heaven lake by john dalton; and a couple of engaging books concerning the continent of africa*****.


* to make sense of the latter comment, you'll need to read crooked river.
** so hot, want to touch the hiney!
*** my failure to finish this tome does not diminish my derivative suspicion that midwestern fiction (see crooked river burning, the mysteries of pittsburgh and the corrections for starters) is currently every bit as good as southern fiction.
**** guess i just wasn't lovin' on my liberal side that day.
***** any ideas? please share.

an advent canticle

when my body lies in the ruins
of the lies that nearly ruined me
will you pick up the pieces that were pure and true
and breathe your life into them
and set them free?

~uncle rich, be with you

where, o death, is your victory?

i really don’t know how to talk about these things, so i’m just going to spew them out.

by almost all measures, this has been an absolutely horrible year. in january, i lost a job that i had just started to enjoy after almost six years of meaningless toil. unsurprisingly, that dismissal led to a depression the likes of which i had not experienced since ’95 or ’96. ultimately, my fear of being unemployed led me to accept a job that was not challenging and did not utilize my capabilities. and, to top it off, i lost my loser job the week of thanksgiving when my former, trite giftware company was acquired by a company that peddles even more useless tripe than we did.

moreover, although i’ve always been a little relationally inept, i have never felt as relationally retarded* as i do right now. throughout this year a number of my family and friends have slogged through valleys of unmentionable pain and i have not known how to support them. i haven’t abandoned my dear ones, but i have had little more to offer than a willingness to walk beside them through their personal hells. the combination of my inability to effectively support my friends with my occupational ineptitude eventually led me towards a psychologist’s couch where i have graciously and carefully been encouraged to visit the dark corners of my heart where i have always loathed to tread and confront the fact that though i am surrounded by supporting family and unsurpassed community i continually choose to live as an exile** in the illusory comfort of the margins.

in addition to my occupational and relational issues, i am as confident in my vocation as i am utterly unable to fulfill it. this year has also burdened the sinners and saints community with a number of difficult transitions, convoluted conflicts and missional uncertainties. in the midst of such chaotic times i have not provided clear leadership nor even had a clear picture of what such leadership might be. the only things i have been able to provide are regular teachings on the gospels of luke and occasional glimpses into a soul that is currently being reconstructed. what is more, for some unknown reason in the midst of such ineptitude i have stumbled into a couple of other opportunities to lead and serve. these latter opportunities are at least as horrifying as they are encouraging.

and yet, in the midst of all of this i realize that i am growing in wisdom, stature and favor with God and man at a rate that i have not for almost a decade. in the midst of my ineptitude, i am more in love with God and invested in the incarnational mission of Christ than i have ever been. ironically, the realization of my relational retardation has not alienated me from others but has bound me more tightly to them. it is as though God is simultaneously separating the strands of our lives so that He can weave us together into a basket that can receive, display and serve his beauty, goodness and truth to others. lastly, i have not lamented the loss of my latest job for one moment, but am leaning into the more useful, if not meaningful, employ that God will provide.

there is no doubt that this has been a horrible year indeed. but, in the end, i cannot thank either the Creator or those who have endured it by my side enough for it.

* i usually hate this word and would never use it to refer to people who have significant birth defects, mental and/or physical disabilities. but, for some reason, that is the only word that adequately describes my self-assessment in this area. thus, i do not use this term lightly.

** which is, i suspect, the reason that i am completely in love with the person of Jesus. but that’s a story for another day.

early this morning christianity today news briefs reported that:

"The trustees of Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary voted 36-1 on October 17 to prohibit professors or administrators from promoting charismatic practices, such as private prayer languages. In August, a new seminary trustee, Dwight McKissic, told students during a chapel service that he prays in tongues. McKissic, a pastor in Arlington, Texas, has criticized the Southern Baptist Convention's International Mission Board for barring missionaries from using private prayer languages."

in related news, in a blatant attempt to bind the feet of female chinese ministers who are walking away from the baptist faith and mission statement, the international mission board's committee on house church ministry has redefined all female led congregations as multi-dimensional children's ministries.

finally, last week at the national missionary convention hosted by the independent christian churches, churches of christ, the delegates took the unprecedented step of affirming and publishing a non-binding, yet unquestionably biblical, theological statement that will guide all future missionary endeavors. the agreed upon statement reads as follows: "we the autonomous, male missionaries of the indepedent christian churches, churches of christ do hereby agree that while one must not necessarily be immersed to be saved, one is surely going to hell if one is not." in a brief follow-up statement, convention chair michael nichols suggested that the statement was an attempt to both refute the charges of paedo-baptism that have been regularly raised against the un-denomination through the years and divide the group from any other christian denomination that views the practice differently.

unsolicited baseball opinions




signing alfonso soriano for 17 million per is ridiculous. offering him 8 years when nobody else would probably offer him seven and so ensuring that he’ll be on the payroll as a 38 year old arthritic man is re-damn-diculous. i have heard many rational explanations why this is a horrible signing and a few irrational cub fans argue in support.

the best argument i’ve heard against the Soriano signing is from espn insider’s keith law who opened his most recent article with:

“The team that finished last in the National League in OBP in 2006 (and, not coincidentally, second-to-last in runs scored) with a .319 team mark just signed a left fielder with a .320 career OBP and a .337 OBP in 2006 (both figures exclude intentional walks) to replace a guy with a .365 OBP in 2006. And they're paying $17 million per year for the privilege -- until the new player turns 38.

I'm sure this will work out swimmingly.”

the best argument i’ve heard for the Soriano signing is…, um, likely to be muttered by some frat boy in naperville after he’s had six bucks worth of old style.*

the mets just declined to exercise their $14 mil option on tom glavine for 2007 and, due to the current state of their starting rotation and the cost of starting pitching, i’m fairly certain minaya will look back on this decision as a mistake.

go back and read that latter assertion again. i’m afraid it pretty much summarizes the 2006-2007 hot stove season.

the miserly middle-class cardinals and their faithful middle-class fans debated whether jock should pick up jim edmonds’ $10 mil, 2007 option for the better part of two months. then, when the cardinals re-signed “jed” to a 2 year, $18 mil deal most of us considered it excessive. now the reports that the dodgers are signing juan pierre to a 5 yr/45 mil contract have us dancing in the streets.

did i mention that jim hendry is trying to shore up his outfield defense with cliff floyd and is attempting to sign julio lugo

when he already has de rosa at second and izturis at short? something tells me hendry is screaming at his subordinates to get julio franco on the phone and gammons and rosenthal are reconsidering their measured support of the soriano move.

doling out 51.1 million just to negotiate with scott boras for daisuke matsuzaka seemed absolutely absurd until i realized that the cubs could have signed “d-mat” and probably a second tier starter like ted lilly for the same money they spent on sori.

ladies and gentlemen, i present to you the cubs' brand-new #2 starter:



after the jed re-up and the signing of our super-sub jocketty and the cardinal’s camp has been strangely quiet. there are moments when i fear that this silence is evidence of ownership’s reticence to spend serious cash on off-season acquisitions. but, as often as not, i realize that jock is to michael as hendry is to sonny and both haugen and purpura are slick but inconsequential.

* i realize that rosenthal and gammons have provided measured support as well, but i assume that is because they savor the idea of hendry hanging himself.

unanxious daze: an exodus from under-employment


today i am celebrating my ninth month at Silvestri.* and, in even better news, yesterday i got laid off!

as sick as it sounds, for the last 24 hours i have been in a jubilant mood. as of tomorrow afternoon at 2:30 p.m. i never have to explain to the good folks at hotflash america that we do not return items from 2004, serve as my manager's fashion adviser and will never have to say put your big girl panties on and deal with it or you've got boobs! ever again. can you believe that they are actually paying me to leave this company that will soon cease to exist? me neither.

of course i feel bad for my coworkers, some of whom are afraid of re-entering the job market after a thirty year hiatus and others who are loathe to leave an industry that - for some godforsaken reason - they love. but make no mistake, tomorrow after i've given one last hug, muttered one final encouraging cliche and logged off my computer i will once again be a free man.

i am ready to offer one long, last goodbye to silvestri and say hello to a non-profit job that i can actually enjoy (or at least endure). by God's grace, i hope that i never have to settle for a job like this again.

during this time of transition, i would appreciate it if those of you who know and suffer me would be willing to challenge me when i set my occupational sights too low, know of any leads you stumble across and perhaps even whisper a prayer for kellie and i from time to time.

now, if you'll excuse me, i am going to pour a cup of tea and head over to Viva El Birdos. much love, much peace.

In this Theological Discussion, God is Considered Optional

When a local theological group gathers Tuesday in a Kenmore Square office, its members won't be talking about God. They'll be talking about not talking about God.

The Boston Emergent Cohort hosts Peter Rollins, author of "How (Not) to Speak of God," for a 7 p.m. discussion at 655 Beacon St., Suite 301. The Cohort is part of a progressive Christian movement known as the Emerging Church, which seeks to encourage conversations among believers about Christianity's role in the modern world.

Rollins, who heads a church in Ireland, is a leading voice in the movement. A reviewer recently described his book as "powerful but frustratingly opaque."

Both qualities are likely to be on display at the event. Rollins is expected to discuss his proposal for "heretical orthodoxy," according to Jeff Gentry, a facilitator with the Cohort and pastor to a small home-based church in Beverly. Heretical orthodoxy means moving theology away from "a study of God as object, or a theology that seeks to believe the right things" and toward an idea of "Christianity as trying to live in the right way," Gentry says.

Anna Gerdeen, studying for a master's at Harvard Divinity School, became involved in the Emerging Church in her native Minnesota before moving to the area three years ago and connecting with the Cohort. Gerdee says she's seen increased interest in nontraditional religion.

"With the large number of students and young people in the area, people come into here from different backgrounds from all over the country, and different Christian traditions," she says, creating fertile ground for new ideas.~J.M. BERGER

this brief piece was included in the metro section of sunday's boston globe. props to anna for drawing my attention to the article. i appreciate mr. berger's interest in emergent and his unexpected inquiry. however, i would like to affirm that God will likely be a primary subject of, and hopefully participant in, our conversation on tuesday. moreover, i appreciate the fact that the writer quoted me correctly and wish the latter spelling of anna's last name was correct.

i hope that a number of you are joining us on tuesday for a beerworks dinner at 5:30 and a stimulating conversation with peter at 7 pm. if you're interested in picking up a copy of how (not) to speak of God we'll have copies available for $12 thanks to the generous folks at paraclete press.

for an interesting introduction to peter's thought, check out nick and josh's most recent podcast.*

* i haven't had the time to listen to the podcast myself, so i'm acting on complete faith here. nick and josh, don't let me down.

musing...


during my years at soybean bible the writings of henri nouwen were essential to my spiritual health. however, in the years since i left soybean and, later, l’arche daybreak behind, i have only revisited his writings rarely.

i am starting to suspect that my indifference is a mistake.

a couple of nights ago, after receiving news that yet another friend is mired in the midst of crisis, i took can you drink the cup off the shelf. i can’t remember reading this little work before, but i confess that it has served as a remarkable sacrament in my life this week.

i must confess that much like james and john, i often lust for influence and recognition in the Kingdom of God. as a fully equipped servant of Jesus, i consider myself a significant member of Jesus’ mission and expect to be included in noteworthy, if not successful, incarnations of God’s beauty, truth and goodness in this world. in short, i want to build a successful and meaningful career on the back of the one who humbled himself and made himself obedient to death on a cross. fortunately, in response to my foolishness Jesus neither rejects me nor reviles me as "satan," but simply asks: "can you drink the cup?"

henri has helped me to see that responding to this question requires me to pause and consider whether i have the courage to hold the cup of our great suffering and great joy in my hands; in full knowledge of the cup’s bittersweet contents, i can lift the cup and offer a blessing in the midst of curse and whisper rumors of life in the midst of death; and, ultimately, drink the cup of suffering and joy to the dregs.

in the midst of my longing for success, Jesus is calling me to become fully human. as much as it pains me to admit it, he could care less whether i have a successful career or whether i continue to wander through occupational hell for the rest of my days. Jesus has not promised me an honored position, but he has called me to be a parable of his grace and truth. further, Jesus has not sent me forth to construct a respectable curriculum vitae, but he has given me the mission of weeping with those who weep and mourning with those who mourn.

leave it to Jesus to deconstruct my delusions and unravel my expectations with a single question: "can you drink the cup."

five minute movie review: borat

i was initially reluctant to pay $10 to see this film, but after hearing a number of reviewers describe it as a form of provocative cultural commentary and hearing kidpositive and cade's enthusiasm for this film, i decided to take a chance.

although i did not think that the film provided particularly insightful cultural commentary - i'm sure that with a little editing and enough "gotcha" set-ups you can make any country look like it is full of racist, ignorant fools - i have to admit that the movie was incredibly funny. there were scenes that made me really uncomfortable such as when the "throw the Jew down the well" singing borat and his companion found themselves shacked up at a Jewish owned bed and breakfast, but there were also hysterical scenes, especially the one in which borat sings the kazakh national anthem to the tune of the star spangled banner at a virginia rodeo, that were completely worth the price of admission.

if you don't mind a little controversial humor and can stand the sight of a male on male sixty-nine,* then you might want to give borat a shot. please note, i am not recommending the film as such, but i think a number of you would find it hysterical.

one side note: over the past couple of weeks there have been reports that the south carolina fraternity boys who made asses of themselves in the film, the romanian extras who stood in as extras in borat's "kazakh" village and any number of others are planning to sue sacha cohen for their portrayal in the film. i think such lawsuits are ridiculous and are likely built upon legal sand. in the midst of a satirical situation, decent, upright people such as the humor coach, the newscasters and, as much as i hate to admit it, the southern baptist people on secession drive proved their decency, while sketchy folk such as the frat boys and the rodeo manager showed their asses.

if you've caught the flick, i'd love to hear your thoughts.

* the pixie covered my eyes during that part.

UPDATE! boston's emergent cohort presents peter rollins



due to unexpected publicity and the possibility of a higher than expected turnout we have decided to move the main cohort gathering to the offices of Reunion Church (665 beacon st, Suite 301, Boston, MA 02215). moreover, since a number of us would also like to gather at the fenway beerworks (61 brookline ave, boston, ma 02215) for dinner we're going to do that as well.

so if you want to join us for dinner, meet us at the fenway beerworks around 5:30 pm. the regular meeting will start at 7 pm at the offices of Reunion church. got it? if not, feel free to comment or send queries to jeff gentry at gentry13@gmail.com.

"All my friends became Cardinal fans and grew up happy and liberal. I became a Cub fan and grew up imbittered and conservative." - George Will

now that it is far less likely to be perceived as piling on...

i would like to draw your attention to jeff sharet's piece entitled Soldiers of Christ that focuses upon ted haggard and new life church. in this article, which was published in harper's over a year ago, mr. sharet skillfully reveals the triumphalism and alludes to the docetism which plagues american evangelicalism. moreover, he also records the musings of a royal ranger leader which now seem eerily prophetic. if you take the time to peruse this article, or any number of pieces on killing the buddha you will not be disappointed.

of course, after you read the article i'd love to hear your thoughts and reflections.

-------

update: KTB has also posted these reflections by patton dodd, who is the author of the well-regarded my faith so far, beliefnet columnist, alumnae of oral roberts university*, attender of new life church and close friend of ted haggard. patton's intimate reflections focus on the power of repentance and the hope reconciliation. this article pierced my soul.**

* the campus of which looks so much like walt disney world's tomorrowland (circa 1986) that it skeeves me out)

** i realize the latter statement probably sounds cheesy as hell, but...

some sacraments are unexpected


a few moments ago, while talking with cade about N&MBL@* and surfing boston.com i ran across a puff piece titled worst jobs ever. i found the first few entries, which focused on a subservient cocktail waitress and driving range ball bitch, rather innocuous. but then, but then, i ran across a winner:

"While in college (down south where there's very few jobs), I worked in a factory that made the plastic covers for Die Hard car batteries. The covers would come sliding down the conveyor belt after being stamped by an automated machine with the words DIE HARD. My job, was to stand there (not allowed to sit) and look at each plastic cover as it passed and make sure the words DIE HARD were stamped on perfectly straight. If it was crooked (AND THEY NEVER WERE) I had to throw it out. To make matters worse they were 12 hour shifts. 5 minutes literally felt like an hour. It was so loud you had to wear ear plugs, so you couldn't even use a radio to pass the time. Not the worst or grossest job in the world, but DEFINITELY one of the most boring and mind-numbing." -townclose

have you ever had a job that is as monotonous or hilarious as this one? if so, please tell. as for me, this little story is a sacrament that has set me free to sail into tomorrow (relatively) unencumbered.

* if you ask nicely, mr. sajak might let you buy a vowel.

university of virginia sociologists study "what women want..."

and are shocked to find that they aren't infatuated with drunken australian anti-semites.

but seriously, this afternoon christianitytoday.com is featuring an interview with sociologists steven l. nock and w. bradford wilcox that i found quite interesting. after reading any number of arguments that were provoked by mark driscoll's comments* concerning the weight of minister's wives, i found this article on how husbands can serve their wives quite refreshing. i have posted an excerpt of the article below, but i hope you can take the time to read the article in its entirety.

What makes married women happy?

"The biggest predictor of women's happiness is their husband's emotional engagement. The extent to which he is affectionate, to which he is empathetic, to which he is basically tuned into his wife, this is the most important factor in predicting the wife's happiness. This basically drowns out every other factor in our models."

read more...

* NB: bullet point 2.

boston's emergent cohort presents peter rollins

on tuesday, november 21st @ 7 pm the cohort will be gathering at boston beerwork's fenway location (61 brookline ave, boston, ma 02215) for food, drinks and theological discussion. our guest this month is peter rollins, who is a founder of the ikon community in northern ireland, a philosophical theologian who is deeply intrigued with the emergent church and the author of how (not) to speak of God. in how (not) to speak of God peter provocatively exposes the theoretical foundations of the emergent church and explores how the ikon community has sought to innovatively commend and incarnate the God about whom we can never speak definitively, but should never stop speaking.*

in short, this is one cohort gathering you will not want to miss. if you'd like to know a little more about peter rollins, check out this short interview at paracletepress.com. if you are interested at picking up a discounted copy of how (not) to speak of God you can pick one up at the gathering. if you live in another city and are interested in hearing Peter speak, check out his additional speaking dates. and, lastly, if you have any questions about our gathering, contact jeff at gentry13@gmail.com.

* the latter clause in this confounded sentence was inspired by peter's writing but is not a direct quote.

do you love me?

if so, protect me from the ravages of consumerism and support one of my deepest passions by purchasing this for me:



for the record, i am a little pissed that they did not include the games of the NLCS in this set like they included the 2004 ALCS in the red sox set, but i will still be an incomplete person without this product.

thank you for your patronage and may God Bless America.

jeffrey gentry: this is your life!



last night, at five minutes until five, i took a call on the customer service line. receiving such calls at five 'til five is almost always a mistake. this was no exception. this morning, i mined our electronic transcripts in order to transcribe the call. it went something like this.

jg, c.s.s.: "thank you for calling sentimental somethings this is jeff."

customer: "hello jeff, this is deborah jo at the fuchsia feline. i am calling because...oh gawd! mr. fish! mr. fish! mr. fish! my fish just jumped out of his bowl and is wrigglin' on the floor. oh gawd!"

jg, c.s.s.:

deborah jo:: "i've gotta save him, but i don't wanna touch him. oh, oh, EWWWW! mr. fish, don't die. don't die.

he was so rubbery, but at least i saved him."

jg, c.s.s.: "so are you following up on a damage claim or checking your order status?"

before i forget i would like to admit…

that in the workplace i am a detail oriented, task driven, motivated mother(bleep)er. i work well with people are committed to working hard and getting the job done and i disdain people who either do not have their (bleep) together or laze the day away. in addition, in regards to inter office communication, i communicate in a clear, carefully considered, matter of fact manner. i neither speak inappropriately to my coworkers or pussy foot around potential problems. i will not disregard people’s errors or ignore failure to meet minimal standards in order to protect someone’s feelings. if you are looking for someone who will overlook your errors in order to protect your emotions watch.(bleep)ing.oprah. the miracle of syndication has ensured that she is easily accessible.

in other news, last night, after talking to josh jackaway about his mega-church experience and peppering him with questions for four hours, i realized that i am still utterly fascinated with every form of church. occasionally someone will openly wonder whether my participation in a home church is simply a revolt against and/or critique of the mega-church. let me assure you that it is not. i did not give my life to serve the home church in particular but to serve the catholic church writ large. thus, i am constantly fascinated by the variety of ways that people proclaim the gospel of Jesus, incarnate Christ’s Kingdom and pursue God’s mission in this world. of course, that does not mean that any form is beyond critique.

ever since the cardinals won the world series i have not taken off my team gear, stopped reading recaps of the series and pouring over the pictures in sports illustrated’s world series edition. after so many years of post season frustration i am utterly amazed that the cardinals are the world champions. i am planning to write about my world series experience in the near future and, for frugality’s sake, am forever grateful that i do not live anywhere near the cardinals team store.

overheard

i'm following montgomery brewster's advice today by voting for "NONE OF THE ABOVE!"* however, that does not mean that i am disinterested in political issues and the general direction of our country. i've stumbled across a couple of excellent pieces about politics and evangelical interactions in politics lately that i would like to share.

first, i recently finished state of denial, which is the third volume in bob woodward's bush at war series. there are so many things that i could say about this rather massive tome, but i will limit my loquaciousness by offering a few blunt, opinionated reflections:

1) according to woodward, donald rumsfield has almost completely ignored the joint chief's perspectives on the military actions in iraq and in afghanistan. this has led to our almost criminally deficient deployments of troops and has shielded the executive branch from the realistic assessments of the soldiers in the field.

2) i had no idea that bush pushed out one of america's finest soldiers out of the secretary of state role so that he could employ an over-matched russianist who had failed to effectively fulfill her last government post. i have to agree with george herbert walker bush when he states that condi is a "real disappointment."

3) on account of either his natural optimism or his absolute belief in his failed foreign policy, bush has never wavered from his decision to invade iraq and will probably never authorize a strategic retreat from that morass. in this volume, bush is portrayed as a good natured, energetic, political fundamentalist. i suspect that this portrayal would have been more nuanced had bush agreed to be interviewed for this work like he allowed himself to be interviewed for plan of attack.

second, kellie forwarded me this excellent article by wheaton alumnus and former bush speechwriter michael gershon, in which the author suggests some healthy ways forward concerning a new "faith-based agenda." gershon's conception focuses more on global poverty and health issues that internal, american social issues and he suggests a manner in which candidates on both sides of the aisle can learn to connect with american christians who are no longer solely concerned with prayer in schools, idols in state courthouses and abortion.

third, andy crouch conducted an intriguing interview with former faith based initiatives staffer david kuo concerning kuo's new work tempting faith. crouch is his cantankerous, contrarian self in this interview and works hard to uncover kuo's intentions concerning this work. the result is an edgy, informative interview which talks about such issues as evangelical naivete in american politics and the need for evangelicals to undergo training and perhaps even a type of political ordination before heading into the partisan fray.

finally, gordon macdonald offers some helpful reflections concerning the haggard scandal and hints at the dangers of evangelical political accommodation.

* if you are tempted to lecture me about my democratic responsibilities please refrain. i think quite a bit about politics, but usually (i.e., when bush is not running for president) refrain from voting in local, state or national elections. i would like to think that my tendencies are rooted in the anabaptist tradition, but there is a good chance my choice is the result of my deep cynicism concerning the political process and/or appalling apathy.

mid-morning time waster

last night, while listening to all things considered on the way back from my proctologist’s office, i heard a clip of president bush at a rally in florida* proclaim: “we do have a plan for victory in iraq. and part of that plan is keeping congress in republican control.”

today’s pressing question: was this statement more or less ridiculous than the following statements?

“the detroit tigers' biggest obstacle to a championship will be keeping a straight face. the tigers in three. (OK, make it four.)” – bob nightingale in his world series preview that was published in usa today

“i did not have sexual relations with that woman, ms. lewinsky.” – president clinton publicly denying a particularly tawdry expression of executive privilege

“i never had a gay relationship with anybody, and i'm steady with my wife. i'm faithful to my wife.” - ted haggard on november 3, 2006

"i think they're in the last throes, if you will, of the insurgency." – dick cheney as quoted on june 20, 2005

* which charlie crist, florida’s republican candidate for governor, declined to attend lest bush’s “popularity” rub off on him.

concerning swaggart part deux

i have little doubt that most of you have heard the allegations that ted haggard, the pastor of new life church in colorado springs and the president of the national association of evangelicals, has been accused of soliciting sex and using methamphetamines. as will samson said so well in this post this is a tragic situation that will profoundly affect everyone involved.

i'm not going to use this event as a launching pad for a sermon lamenting the oppressive expectations of superficial righteousness that we place upon evangelical pastors, though i definitely could, but i cannot help but utter one note of lament.

in response to this tragedy, which is bound to have a profound effect upon haggard's wife and five children, the 15,000 members of new life church and evangelicals who have been influenced by haggard's leadership at the NAE, james dobson offered the following statements on cnn.com:

"It is unconscionable that the legitimate news media would report a rumor like this based on nothing but one man's accusation," Dobson said in a written statement issued before haggard's leave was announced.

"Ted Haggard is a friend of mine, and it appears someone is trying to damage his reputation as a way of influencing the outcome of Tuesday's election -- especially the vote on Colorado's marriage-protection amendment, which Ted strongly supports," Dobson said.

so apparently, according to dobson, the primary cause of this tragic event is the liberal media and the primary consequences will be political.

as if we needed further evidence that dr. dobson just doesn't get it.

as will sampson reminded us, let us continue to pray for ted haggard's family, congregation and the well-being of his accuser.

reader/response

the most recent edition of next-wave features an excellent review of Jesus of Suburbia by dustin bagby and an intriguing article entitled dear emergents by indiana wesleyan professor keith drury. in the latter article professor drury commends the emergent church for its missional orientation, abiding idealism and mystical theology. however, he also offers two words of caution as well.

since the second caution effectively summarizes one of my own deepest concerns about emergent i'm posting it in hopes that you will read and respond.

Keep the church. You are going to be tempted to abandon the church and go off into solitary spirituality. Your crushed idealism may cause you to give up on the assembled people of God and our culture’s individualism will entice you toward your iPod rather than worship on Sunday mornings. There will be voices recruiting you to leave the church—reversing the notion of “called out ones” to being called out of the church to an individualized privatized spirituality. I pray you will not listen to these temptations. Be wary of any who claim to “love Jesus but despise the church.” Refuse to walk away from the assembly of believers into a privatized self-centered spirituality. If you are practicing privatized faith on your own apart from the assembly you are not being a Christian at all—you merely practicing spiritual masturbation. There is no such thing as a solitary Christian any more than a solitary marriage. Christians come in clusters. I hope you emergents will reinvent all kinds of new ways for the church to be the church, but none of them should include a church-less Christianity. For a church-less Christianity is essentially a Christ-less Christianity and thus not Christian at all. To be prepared for this temptation read Bonhoeffer.

overheard: cardinals apologize for winning world series


ST. LOUIS—Calling Friday night's victory on baseball's grandest stage "a terrible mistake," members of the St. Louis Cardinals issued a formal apology for making the playoffs, winning the World Series, and depriving baseball fans everywhere of a season featuring the kind of heartwarming, storybook ending to which they have grown accustomed in recent years. continue reading

overheard

yesterday leadership journal posted an intriguing article entitled preaching past tivo.* if you listen to "godcasts" for fun, enjoy the writings of will willimon, doug pagitt, john ortberg and/or efrem smith or simply have waaay too much time on your hands at work take a moment to read it. i was fascinated with the concept of "a shadow mission" and intrigued by shane claiborne's idea of earthy, life-application teaching. i'd love to hear your reflections.

* i find it a little disturbing that blogger's spell checker knows the proper spelling of TiVo but does not recognize any derivative of homiletics.

disconnected salem reflections

last night we offered peace to the city of salem, watched our beloved brooke perform on the fountain stage and, finally, shut down the confession booth for the season. serving in salem is such an overwhelming experience that i am hesitant to offer a benign summary. so i’d like to offer a few disconnected reflections instead.

when the temperature was at or above 55 degrees i choose to walk the streets barefoot. this discalced look reflects my love for the early franciscans, never fails to elicit comments from curious onlookers and provides conclusive evidence, due to the remarkable length of my toes, that i am indeed the missing link. last night i had a number of people take pictures of my bare feet, received the requisite amount of admonitions from senior citizens, had a passerby warn me about a pile of horseshit that blighted my intended path and a smartass kid share his hope that i would step on a hypodermic needle. today my feet hurt, so i guess i should give the old ladies their due.

okay, i'll admit it. next year i would really like to have placards and signs that proclaim: "blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons and daughters of God;" "blessed are the poor, for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven;" and "what does the Lord require of you? to act justly, to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God."

on a couple of occasions last night i was almost certain i was about to get my ass kicked. fortunately that didn’t happen.

throughout the day yesterday the cliché office conversation focused on the fears that there would be a gang battle in salem on halloween night. there was a grandmother worrying about her grandchildren, receptionists responding to the fear mongering on “news” radio* and a few people expressing amazement that i would spend time in salem on halloween. today, after hearing the reports of the relatively minor incidents that took place, people still can’t talk enough about the police thwarting the evil plans of the chelsea crips or recounting the stories of the two minor stabbings that took place. maybe i’m being an arse for saying this, but whenever i hear people obsessing about possible gang wars in salem or the supposed “lights out weekend” gang initiations that people worried about during my youth i hear a whispered subtext that sounds something like this: THE BLACK PEOPLE ARE COMING TO TOWN! WATCH OUT FOR YOUNG BLACK PEOPLE! HOW CAN WE KEEP OUR KIDS SAFE WHEN BLACK PEOPLE ROAM THE STREETS? maybe i’m misinterpreting the subtext, but i don’t think so. the overwhelming presence and subtle power of white, suburban suspicion is so strong that i caught myself doing a little freelance racial profiling last night. that makes me ashamed.

i must say that the haters, er…i mean the street preachers, were remarkably restrained last night. one of them was speaking so reasonably and persuasively about sexual ethics that a couple of young local women** stopped and told a group of our monks that if young men actually lived in line with such ethics “a lot less women would get hurt.” these young women were of eastern orthodox and coptic christian ancestry and shocked our monks by telling them to affirm the street preacher for “speaking the truth.” i was also surprised that by the end of the night several of the street preachers came to the gathering space seeking reconciliation with the church leaders and, to my knowledge, none of our monks were openly denounced or had a negative word spoken against them.***
i also ran into a guy that i spent talking to on monday night and he asked me how he could get in touch with me in the future. i suspected he might have been a tad too inebriated to either remember my phone number or write it down, so i told him to visit my friends at the gathering space if he wanted to contact me. at that he smiled and said “hey, if those guys are anything like you, they’re totally cool with me. i’ll stop by.” i must admit that i found that encounter rather gratifying.

we were fortunate to have a number of young gordon college students with us last night who entered into intriguing spiritual conversations with people by simply asking questions. i was impressed by their generosity of Spirit and genuine interest in the opinions of those who walked the streets of salem.

ok, that’s about it. i’m exhausted, my feet hurt and my voice is shredded. once again, it was a blessing to us to work beside the gathering as they seek to bless the people of salem. it is intoxicating to partner with a church that is on the mission and we’re looking forward to serving again next year.


* why would anyone in boston listen to a “news” radio station other than npr? one has to wonder.

** a couple of whom were sporting the almost requisite “i’m a hottie whore” outfits.

*** which is all the more intriguing since i went out of my way to wander into their preaching pit and shout things like “if you’ve heard enough condemnation from the church, come to confession,” “it’s time to purge the pulpits, it’s time to clean out the vestries, come to confession” and “if you’re sick and tired of Christian hypocrisy, come to confession” on a number of occasions.

overheard...

"Jesus doesn't meet our needs; he rearranges them. He cares very little about most things that I assume are my needs, and he gives me needs that I would've never had if I hadn't met Jesus. He reorders them.

I used to ask seminarians, "Why are you in seminary?" They'd say, "I like meeting people's needs." And I'd say, "Whoa. Really? If you try that with the people I know, they'll eat you alive."

Now, if you're a pastor in Honduras, it might be okay to define your ministry as meeting needs, because more people in Honduras have interesting biblical needs—food, clothing, housing. But most people in the churches I know get those needs met without prayer. So they've moved on to "needs" like orgasm, a satisfying career, an enjoyable love life, a positive outlook on life, and stuff the Bible has absolutely no interest in." - Will Willimon as quoted in Leadership Journal

livin' for the love of the city




last night we served with this guy, pastor phil wyman. all of us at sinners and saints love this guy and think you’ll love him too. the story of his community’s commitment to “be a blessing to the city of salem” is featured on the front page of the wall street journal and is included in the the salem evening news as well. you can pick up the journal at your local newsstand and read the news article by clicking on the link provided above.

in related news...

life has been really rich lately. i’ve reveled in renewed connections with friends in the lou and chicago-land, felt my crusty soul unfold as simkins and i rolled through the midwest, reveled in the cardinals winning the world series and spied the first signs of reconciliation in one of my most essential relationships. so much has happened that i’ve had precious little time to write, but i suppose that’s the way it goes. of course, i’m planning to explore these experiences further sometime after they cease to be relevant.

i suppose that’s a long way of saying that i would like to forego any reflection on the past week so that i can talk about what happened last night. for the past several years a small contingent of sinners and saints has been partnering with the gathering as together we seek to “be a blessing” to the people of salem. throughout the years we’ve served free hot chocolate, offered “p(s)alm readings”* and donned monk robes to offer free confessions to whomever will hear them.**

last night, as we were wolfing down meatball subs and openly wondering whether we should open the confession booth since there was a surprisingly small crowd walking in and around essex street, phil wyman received a call from christian day, one of salem’s high priests of wicca. christian reported that the entrance to their psychic fair was being obstructed by fundamentalist preachers who were causing quite an uproar. so he decided to call pastor phil and the police in hopes that the witches and the visitors to the witch city could find some peace. at that moment, for some unknown reason, i received christian’s plea as a call to action. so four of us quickly finished our subs, donned our monk robes and headed down to the museum place mall.

once we arrived on the scene, i realized we were walking into a fairly volatile situation. the street preachers were condemning the crowds of sins like beastaphilia, the witches were claiming that one of their number was physically assaulted by either a member of repent america or an associated group and a goth kid was verbally abusing the preachers, denouncing the christians by screaming things that i am hesitant to repeat and stopping just short of taking a swing at any person who countered him.***

at that moment, i realized that i needed to do some pretty quick thinking. should i stand in front of the preachers and counter their condemnation by proclaiming Christ’s blessing upon peacemakers? i tried this approach for a moment but quickly realized that fighting fire with fire was not the best option. should i spend the next few hours standing in front of the “persecution cams,” smiling a benign smile and thwarting fundamentalist attempts to blatantly objectify my fellow citizens? i tried this course for a while, but realized it only incensed the “preachers” all the more and did little fulfill our calling to “bless the city of salem.” finally, i settled on simply speaking grace and truth to both the passerby and those who were committed to condemning non-christians for failing to live up to a kingdom ethic. this latter approach appeared to produce the best fruit, a couple of slices of which i would like to share below.

almost as soon as i decided to share Christ’s peace with the crowd i bumped into a young man who had once been a foster child of a family i know quite well. as soon as i saw him i removed my hood, reminded him of our connection and encouraged he and his friend not to pay much mind to the spite the preachers were spewing or even pay them much attention. i told that by standing around gawking at the street preachers and trying to convince the latter that they actually were not “nazis” they were only encouraging this event to continue.

after i spoke with a few more people i bumped into a leather clad townie who seemed amused by the street preachers and openly wondered “how anyone could take this shit seriously.” i confessed to him that i was a Christian who believed that Christ offered us the most beautiful, good and true approach to life, but that i thought it was ridiculous for the church to require non-christians to embrace the sexual ethics**** that Christ expected of the church and believed that the group that most needed to heed the call to repentance was the church. the townie responded that he had fought many great battles in his life against “crack, crystal meth and the bottle” but had ultimately found freedom from his addictions. moreover, he readily admitted that he believed in Jesus and, during one of the street preacher’s more hostile harangues, he pulled out a harmonica and started to play amazing grace.

in the midst of these encounters i also had the opportunity to speak with a young christian woman who had traveled all the way from wisconsin to preach to the people of salem. after we had a brief discussion concerning the primary focus of prophetic condemnation in the scriptures***** i asked her whether she had ever heard of marshall mcluhan. she told me that she hadn’t, so i spent a few moments explaining his dictum that “the medium is the message” and openly wondering with her whether spreading condemnation upon non-Christians was the best way to share the life in Christ we both value so dearly. our amicable discussion reminded me that true dialogue with the street preachers was both possible and potentially beneficial.

later i spoke with a slightly inebriated man who really wanted to know whether God’s forgiveness, which to him seemed to good to be true, was real and later responded to another question by affirming that even a broken man on his deathbed was not beyond the gracious embrace of God.

there were other remarkably beautiful encounters as well, such as when one of the witches crashed the church after all the earlier craziness to thank us for being a means of peace to the city of salem,****** but i’ve probably said too much already.

i’ll conclude by simply noting that last night i had the opportunity to share the gospel of God’s peace and embody Christ’s reconciliation in a manner, and to an extent, that i never have before. moreover, i left the city revelling in the fact that those who seek to be a blessing are often the most blessed indeed.

i can’t wait to get back to salem. if you’re in the area and would like to join us you are more than welcome.

* which i absolutely suck at.

** we confess the sins of the church in hopes that the Holy Spirit can clear new ground wherein reconciliation takes place. we stole this idea from donald miller’s blue like jazz and freely admit that our act is wholly unoriginal.

*** one of the fundamentalist’s video cameras was not so lucky.

**** the preachers roundly condemned homosexuality, adultery and fornication and returned to the topic of homosexual marriage time and again. but apparently they found the topic of beastiality most titillating. i must confess that after they loudly addressed “those who practice beastiality” i loudly asked “so where are the sheep?” i don’t know if the latter question was constructive, but i found it quite funny.

***** for the record, the people of God are almost always the object of such condemnation. Jesus does indeed denounce people as whitened sepulchers and hypocrites, but you’ll never find him speaking in such a manner to egyptians or greeks. the same principle almost always applies to the old testament prophets as well, though, in fairness, jonah did openly denounce the ninevites.

****** forgive me if i keep further details of that beautiful encounter to myself. some encounters should not be reduced to words.

memorandum from captain random



this article is the oddest piece i have ever read on CT.com. if you often find yourself wondering what ann coulter, doing "the binky" and the ingredients of conejo soup have to do with Christian discipleship, you'll love this article.

if would rather die than have to repeat phrases like "it's time to get your big girl panties on!," "you have boobs" or "y'all pause for menopause" to middle aged southern women one.more.time.

tomorrow i'm heading out to chicago to join mr. simkins for a journey down the world series. be sure to look for us on FOX.* it's your duty judy!

i was oddly intrigued by this cnn puff piece on bob newhart. i especially liked the part where he confessed: "Being a comedian," he writes, "means you are antiauthority at heart." that quote reminded me of dr. david wells' warning that "the most violent thing you can do to an institution, proposition or person is to laugh at it." i often remember that admonition from dr. wells right before i smirk and start ripping.

* i'll be the asshole snapping a rally-towel in a random thunder-stick user's face.

Isaiah 40:28-31

Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The LORD is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.

He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.

Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;

but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.

the first time i met dr. spencer he described his church as “a wonderful place to be sick in.” he responded to the question on my face by saying, “if i was dying of cancer, pilgrim church is right where i would want to be.” as a progeny of the church growth movement, i had expected dr. spencer to define his church by their vision, numbers or programs. so it surprised me when he defined his church as a source of sweet consolation.

a couple of years ago, i got really hooked on a sermon tape that was produced by leadership magazine. on one side of the tape, john piper preached a rousing sermon on racial reconciliation focusing on 2 corinthians 5 and mlk’s “letter from the birmingham jail” as his primary texts. since i am a son of the south who has wrestled with the demons of racism and learned that the surest sign of salvation is one’s desire for and sacrifices on behalf of reconciliation, i found this sermon incredibly inspiring. on the other side featured a “leadership community” teaching by john ortberg in which he envisioned spiritual growth in terms of the passage i’ve quoted above. pastor ortberg began by admitting that some Christians, especially in an environment like willow creek, truly soar in their faith. these people have a deep and abiding relationship with God, find it easy to invite others into the life of God and are constantly incarnating the faith in powerful ways. other people, he surmised, are running the race of faith and not growing weary. some of these folks are new to the faith and cannot get enough of Jesus’ teachings, others are people who find obedience to the sermon on the mount to be an absolute delight. however, ortberg confessed that there are still others who can barely find the strength to walk in faith. these are people who find it difficult to get out of bed every morning, are constantly afraid of the signs of despair that blight the horizon and can barely find the strength to persevere in the faith. ortberg’s admonition to this latter group was to neither fixate on those who soar or envy of those who run, but to simply keep walking.
keep walking.

today, after nine months of desperate struggle in the midst of a year that has been littered with death and surrendered few signs of life, i am finding it hard to walk. fortunately, much like dr. spencer, i realize that i am in the midst of a community that constantly dispenses sweet consolation, i am blessed with a pixie-like wife who will not let me collapse before the pernicious clouds on the horizon and have friends who do not consider it a burden to carry me along when the situation requires it.

this is not a cry for help but a commendation of a God who graciously empowers soarers, runners and walkers alike and a community that truly cares for its members. truly, i am blessed.

overheard by pixie

Lunch break at a doctor's office is pretty much synonymous with magazine perusal. Today I decided to take a break from "People" and read the cover article in last week's Time Magazine about Barak O'Bama.

I have a hunch that the following quote will be following me around for the next few days quietly disrupting my neatly ordered ideas. Since misery loves company, I shared the quote with Jeff who wanted to subject the whole blogosphere to the misery that is the thinking mind.

"It has not always been the pragmatist, the voice of reason, or the force of compromise, that has created the conditions for liberty," he writes about the antislavery movement of the 19th century. "knowing this, I can't summarily dismiss those possessed of similar certainty today - the antiabortion activist...the animal rights activist who raids a laboratory - no matter how deeply I disagree with their views. I am robbed even of the certainty of uncertainty - for sometimes absolute truths may well be absolute." *

The companion article entitled My Spiritual Journey (did he take IDS 201?) provides some interesting thoughts on the role of community providing a home for ideals, particularly as it led to his conversion to Christianity.

Not all things in life are provided gratis so for these thoughts you will have to do a little reading yourself.

* Bold font in last line added by the Pixie for emphasis.

musing...



the further i walk down this narrow road of faith, the more reticent i become about reducing discipleship to evangelism. i don’t believe the disciple’s sole calling is to seek the conversion of the world. rather, i suspect that our calling is to: holistically follow Jesus, communally proclaim the Kingdom of God and together incarnate Christ’s compassion upon the world.

that being said, i have nothing but respect for many of my brothers and sisters in Christ who are absolutely on fire for evangelism. both the intensity of their focus and their willingness to be made fools for Christ is laudable, and i long to be as passionate about praying for my persecutors or advocating on behalf of the fatherless as they are for sharing the four spiritual laws or hearing their friends and family mutter the “sinner’s prayer.”

although i question (and, honestly, sometimes detest) the methods used and the ends sought by my fellow ee-vangelicals and fundies, and think both the church and the world could benefit from the ecclesia following brian mclaren’s advice to spend a few years apologizing for our sins instead of investing ourselves more fully in apologia, i am jealous of the ee-vangelical fire and, today anyway, find myself lusting for their passion.

i fear this is a weird confession, but i’m going to post it anyway.

go cards.

musing...

this morning realized that many of my mentors have been trying to teach me the same lesson for years. uncle freddy constantly reminds me that God is not a captive of our abstract conceptions, but chooses to engage, and in a very real sense unfold His life in the midst of, tangled up individuals and dysfunctional communities who for some unexplained reason still long for a sense of the holy. in his music and with his life rich reminded me that Jesus is not captive to the demands or expectations of any sub-culture. in fact, He is committed to turning over tables in every nook and cranny of the public square and constantly calling us to leave our place of comfort and meet him in the margins. moreover, philip yancey has spent the better part of a decade reminding me that our first-century Jewish Messiah is not captive to our reductionistic confessions and God's grace usually operates outside of our conceptual boxes.

again and again this small contingent of God's great cloud of witnesses is chanting God is not captive, God is not captive.

so why do i continue to live like the life of God and the incarnation of His Kingdom is somehow captive or contained within the church? why do i disassociate participating in the life of God within the context of the church from working out my faith within the context of work? every once in a while, i realize that i am failing to follow God and serve those who were created in His image in the workplace, which fortunately or not, is the context in which i live the majority of my waking life. in those moments, like this moment, when i realize that i have left the way of Jesus outside the door of our cubicle farm and could care less about incarnating the Kingdom within this space i am utterly ashamed.

i realize that God is not captive to my compartmentalized world. it's time to start living in step with that truth.

mid-morning time waster: your customer secret service exam


your manic-depressive, non-christian c.s.s. co-worker has had coldplay’s fix you playing on repeat for three straight hours. you know that your co-worker is currently in a manic phase, has recently threatened to dispose of an adversary by “cutting them up into little pieces and vacuuming them up with a vacuum cleaner” and will probably collapse into gasping sobs if you say anything, but you feel that it is time to act. would you address the situation by:

a) politely requesting that your co-worker put jim henson’s “rainbow connection,” her other favorite song, on repeat for the remainder of the day.

b) give her a burned copy of sonic flood’s derivative new single, “Jesus Christ will fix you,” so that she will break the monotony and hopefully get saved.

c) cut chris martin into little pieces and vacuum him up in a vacuum cleaner.

d) keep your mouth shut for one time in your occupational forsaken life and sing rodgers and hammerstein’s “the farmer and the cowman should be friends” under your breath in a vain attempt to dislodge the song from your consciousness.