Thursday, July 31, 2008

a christian consumer advisory
by: slowfo

This is a public service announcement: There has been a trickling outbreak over the last year or two of people engaging in the watching of disgraceful movie content. These actions must be stopped. I am warning you. Do not do what I have done. This is my story.

I don't know where I heard it but someone encouraged me to spend my precious Netflix queue-spot on a movie titled, "Facing the Giants." I believe, "It's a great movie with a great message" is what I heard. Let me do you a favor and tell you that you should only watch this film if you are devoid of any and all possible entertainment options including exhausting the option of navel play.

Bad acting. Poor dialogue. And to call the story "predictable" is an understatement. It became a game for me to predict each scene a few moments ahead of when we viewed it....and what do you know?.....I was right every single time. It wasn't hard though. My seven year old was guessing right along with me.

Two good things have come from this movie. One, it does communicate that Jesus died to save mankind.....and two, if you really, REALLY turn to Him, you will receive (drum roll please)...a new car!!....a raise at work!....marital fulfillment including the children you were told would never be born to you!!.....and years and years of occupational success!!

Christianity Today couldn't even stoop so low as to give this film a thumbs up. Josh Hurst writes, "when a film is as unintentionally corny as this one, it's anyone's guess as to how many viewers can stomach all the schmaltz for the positive message at the end."

This movie did bring back some funny memories for me though. Anyone remember the "Thief in the Night" cheesy Christian "exploitation" film of the 70's? If not, YouTube it. Watch some of the scenes with the sound down and it will be tough to tell whether the movie is about to turn into Cheech and Chong or gay porn.

Back to the film at hand. Here's a social experiment for you....go to your local fundamentalist church this Sunday, nudge the churchgoers next to you and tell them what a horrible piece of film making "Facing the Giants" was.....and watch their faces! Ah, what fun. You might even hear one respond to you by saying, "Ya know Jesus said, 'The world will hate you because they have hated me.'" To them, you might just say, "How 'bout the world just hates bad movies. And this is one of 'em."

Lastly, this film does have some redeeming value. Try this for your next party night....grab bottles of whiskey, sit down and watch this film and drink every time tears come to the eyes of any actor on film. You'll be enjoying your evening straight away.


james said...

It's a amazing dude...I've heard so many people at work praise this movie. Even those who decried the Left Behind film series as pathetic, called this movie "so wonderful"!

The management had "Facing the Giants" playing in the Customer Service area of where I work. I caught a bit of the end where the football coach is telling everyone about the power of God. Because God had given a small football team a victory no everyone who trusts in God will be given victory. Pathetic dude...

The only thing that has really improved on the Christian movie circuit is the actual film quality. I mean, these movies all "look" good. But the acting, the script writing, and the film aesthetics are all terrible! I know i shouldn't be, but i'm somewhat amazed at how easily people are duped.

Slowfo, you'll be pleased to know that the makers of Facing the Giants are about to release another film, and starring Kirk Cameron no less... here it is.

james said...

Oh.. and you can watch the trailer for the forthcoming Cameron film here.

Anonymous said...

I am so glad that you wrote about this piece of trash I cannot even call a film. I put it on my Netflix queue fearing the worst and hoping for the best. It was by far the worst I have ever seen. Chalk me up for a Kirk Cameron marathon before I ever watch Facing the Giants again.