reader/response

Prov. 19:11--"a man's wisdom gives him patience; it is to his glory to overlook an offense."

my beautiful wife is a bit forgetful. put her in an office and she will quickly andd efficiently systematize the files, balance the books and even help you maintain a sustainable schedule. but her personal life is a bit more scattered. if you've ever tried to call her cell phone, you can bear witness to this truth. during the weekdays her cell phone often resides on our dresser and throughout the weekend its is safely locked in an office drawer.

usually i find her forgetfulness quite funny, especially since her cell phone disability has turned into an ongoing joke. however, occasionally her forgetfulness will frustrate me to the point that i say something snide. of course, these snide comments are best kept to myself, for i have found that my failure to overlook an offense usually comes back to bite me in the ass.

for instance: last july, after carrying a good deal of furniture and innumerable boxes down the labyrinthine stairs that lead to our basement, kellie and i, along with our friend mark, decided to call it quits for the evening. since we had worked quite hard and we wanted to thank mark for his work, we headed down to a thai restaurant on the corner for dinner. before we headed out the door i told kellie that i did not have my wallet on me and asked if she had her purse with her. she asserted that she did, so we shuffled our exhausted asses down to the thai joint.

after dinner our attentive waitress brought over our bill and kellie opened her wallet to get the debit card. unfortunately, the card wasn't there. she told me she had simply misplaced it. when i asked her where she might have left it she told me that she didn't know, but it could be in a target sack. needless to say, i found the idea of anyone from the cart boy to the waste disposal man having access to our account quite nauseating, so i muttered something snide and condescending before instructing kellie to stay at the restaurant while mark and i went back to our condo for my card. i couldn't believe that she misplaced that (*&^% card, i thought! anyone could have access to that card and we're going to need every penny to pay our first mortgage bill.

in a short time, mark and i returned to the restaurant and i paid the attentive waitress immediately. immediately thereafter we went back the condo, mark headed home and kellie and i collapsed due to both mutual exhaustion and frustration. the next afternoon, after shopping at a local furniture store, kellie and i went to subway for lunch. when we reached the cash register at the end of the bar i pulled out my wallet and reached for my debit card, only to find that it wasn't there. again, my heart raced with the irregular beat that financial quandries so readily produce and i panicked. where was the debit card? had i left it one the dresser? was in it in the front pockets of the dirty jeans that i threw into a corner? did i leave it on the kitchen table? after freaking out for a moment, i realized where the card resided: the thai restaurant on the corner. so, after using kellie's debit card to pay for the meal, we went straight to the restaurant, where the attentive waitress was only too happy to give me back my debit card. needless to say, my tail was between my legs.

on account of this experience i learned that it is not only man's glory, but also a reflection of his wisdom to overlook an offense. for if he fails to do so, especially in marriage, it will undoubtedly bite him in the ass.

i remembered this lesson the other day when, somewhere between the car and the dingy aisles of bell market, kellie lost her brand-new stocking cap. after retracing her steps and getting on my knees to stare under the snow covered belly of the car to look for the cap, i was quite angry and ready to fire a snide solvo in her direction. but, mindful of the reciprocity that accompanies such incidents, i kept my comments to myself.